What Happens When You Run
by Zammie.Forever
Summary: What happened to Cammie while she was gone? How does she get back? What will happen when she does get back? Rated M for rape and suicidal thoughts/attempts **HIATUS**
1. Chapter 1

The door opened and closed so I lifted my head a slight bit and saw Catherine walk in. She smiled at me. I frowned back.

"Hello, Cameron, how have you been?" she asked as she walked over to the music box in the corner. It started to play carnival music; she then looked at the newer torture devices her goons retrieved. I didn't reply but inwardly groaned. It was going to be a long time before anyone found me. I was tied down to a bed in a basement of some place. She picked up a large blade before smiling and walking over. She talked on. "Answer me," she glared.

I didn't respond.

She shrugged and brought the knife to my thigh. I didn't budge so she pulled away, sat the blade back down and walked back up the stairs. I sighed. The door opened again and a boy walked down. He was about my age maybe a year older. He had brown hair and contacts that made his eyes black, they moved a little and I saw blue. He was buff and only wearing boxers.

He smirked at me before grabbing a knife. He walked over and cut my shirt and bra down the middle. He cut my shorts down the legs so they would come off easier and then the same for my panties. I tugged at my bondages but they didn't give, they made my wrist bleed more.

I was scared.

He got on top of me and started kissing me, when I didn't respond he put the knife to my neck and pressed down a little. I whimpered but started to respond. He seemed to like that and took the knife away slightly before he took his hand and licked his finger. He winked at me before shoving his finger into me.

I screamed.

He continued to finger me until my traitorous body became wet enough for him. He smirked and started to bite my nipples roughly. He sucked, bit, tugged, pinched, he did everything. He licked down my body and I shivered in disgust. He took it the wrong way and started eating me out.

I screamed again.

When I came he smirked and licked his lips before kissing me again. I could taste myself on him. He thrust himself into me.

I screamed a blood curdling scream.

I could hear Catherine laughing upstairs. When the guy pulled out, painfully, might I add, he looked down and smirked knowing he had taken my virginity.

I cried.

He thrust into me hard, rough, fast and deep. It hurt so badly and I continued to scream.

He came inside me and slowed for a moment before picking up pace again and going harder. It started to stop hurting and started to feel good and that's what scared me. I screamed and cried louder.

I came.

He smirked and pulled out. He put his cock to my lips and I clenched my jaw. He grabbed the knife and stuck it to my neck again, pressing down. I winced and he forced himself into my mouth. He kept the knife at my throat, daring me to bite him.

I didn't.

He thrust into my mouth and I felt so sick. I wanted to throw up. I was tempted but he kept the knife on my neck. I cried as he started to moan and groan.

He came.

When he pulled out I spit out every last bit of his seed onto the floor. I coughed for a bit. He smirked and put his boxers back on before going upstairs. I silently cried.

I wanted to go home.

I wanted to be as far away from here as possible.

I wanted to be with my dad.

I wanted the music to stop playing.

I passed out.

-Page Break- (three months later)

I woke up to a loud crash. Then the door burst open. I closed my eyes tighter, clenched my fist and curled my toes; waiting for the pain.

I heard the music playing on repeat; it hasn't been turned off since the day I got here, the day I was raped. I heard a knife being picked up and I whimpered. Then I heard the ropes holding me being cut. I opened my eyes and saw Catherine Goode. She handed me booty shorts and a spaghetti strap tank top.

I put them on.

"We will be letting you go today, you will run home. But you will never forget the music," she said as she dragged my half-dead body up the stairs. "Oh, and Cameron, if we catch you before you get home, I would be more than happy to send Zachary the torture tapes," she smirked and slammed the door.

I didn't need to be told twice, I ran. I ran as far as I could. I went to a small city air force looking base and hijacked a chopper without being noticed, I guess I'm not that rusty. I flew it out of the Switzerland Alps and kept going until it ran out of fuel.

It landed in the states.

I saw I was in Virginia Beach, VA. I was thankful I had made it to Virginia but groaned when I realized I was over 200 miles away. I would have to go by foot. I started to run when I saw a car that I could easily take.

So I did.

I drove for a while and I was almost there. I only had about 40 miles to go. The damn car broke down. I would have to run the rest of the way back to Gallagher. And I'm in clothes that show off everything that happened to me. Great! This is fan-fucking-tastic! Note sarcasm.

I got out of the car and started running to the school. I was doing great until I got to Roseville. I ran through ignoring all the odd/scared/worried looks I was getting and ran to my school. It was only 2 miles away. I could make it. I thanked God that I wasn't seen by Josh, DeeDee or Dillon, I wouldn't have made it. I didn't stop running. Not even for a second, I just kept running.

When I reached the school, it was a little unnerving yet not entirely unwelcome, when the Code Black didn't go off.

I ran through the double doors and glanced at the grandfather clock. It was lunch. I ran to the Dining Hall. I burst through the doors and saw everyone's shocked expressions. I gave a small smile and slight wave.

Mr. Solomon and my mom ran towards me, my friends and Zach following close behind. My pain, exhaustion, sorrow and emotional scarring caught up to me. I felt light-headed, my knees buckled and my eyes rolled into the back of my head. I felt a terrible pain in my stomach and felt the blood running down my legs. _Damn_.

I passed out.

-Page Break-

I heard a beeping noise and crying. The beeping got a slight bit faster the more I woke up and I heard gasps. I willed my eyes to open but they refused. I wanted to groan but my throat burned. I wanted to go back to sleep.

"Cameron, we need you to open your eyes for us," Dr. Wolf said. She was my regular doctor lately. I come here more than should be healthy. I tried and failed. I tried again and the intense light burned my eyes. I was so use to the dark basement and lack of light that my eyes hadn't adjusted yet.

I heard the lights switch flick off and the blackness behind my eyes turned from an orangey color to a pure black. I slowly opened my eyes and was staring at the ceiling. I thought back to my past four months and started to tear up but I refused to cry. Not in front of anyone. Not even my doctor.

"Cameron what do you remember?" Buckingham asked me. I lifted my head slightly but stopped short, expecting it to be bound but then remembered I was released so I sat up more. There was a burning pain in my abdomen and ribs but I didn't wince. I had learned to not wince; to fight the pain. It wasn't as bad as half the things I had been through anyways.

"Leaving, being caught, tortured and-" I stopped myself from saying 'raped' "-being released," then I continued as an afterthought occurred to me. "More like released only to be hunted down again, but released nonetheless," I said, checking my wrist.

They were wrapped up in bandages; I figured the same for my ankles. I slowly, carefully, brought my hand up to my neck where my rapist had regularly placed a knife and pressed down. I ran my fingers across the scratches. I doubt there would be permanent scars.

I removed the sheet and checked my legs. They looked fine but I would have some scarring. I looked at one of the cuts and remembered what had happened to earn that. The cut read 'MUSIC' in pretty curly letters and the 'I' dotted with a heart. DeeDee does that with her 'I's too.

"Why is 'MUSIC' carved into your leg?" Liz asked. I stared at the cut.

"I asked Catherine to turn the music down after a week of constant repeat and she carved it into me. I didn't ask again," I said, tracing the letters with my finger. Everyone visibly paled when I said Catherine's name. Mr. Mosckowitz burst into the door.

"IT'S FROM THE CIRCLE!" he shouted. I looked up slowly to see what he was holding and paled. He was holding a tape. I lunged out of bed, pulling any needles that were in me out and tried to grab it from him but someone had me in their arms.

"Stop! Let go!" I squirmed. I couldn't let anyone see the tape. Not a soul could know the hell I went through. "Give me the damn tape!" I shouted fighting harder. I felt something being stabbed into my arm and my body went limp. I started to black out. It was strange, I could still hear but I know I was unconscious.

I was laid back on the bed and Dr. Wolf brought in a TV to play the tape then walked out. I couldn't protest because my muscles wouldn't move. The tape was the one day I hated the most. The first day I was there, the first day I was raped. I heard the part where Catherine walked out without harming me. Everyone sighed, relieved.

The door slammed again. When they saw the guy come down in nothing but boxers they got silent. I heard him start to kiss me and I heard myself scream as he fingered me. I heard as he ate me and my rapist moan when we came. Then I heard the spiting and coughing.

The tape ended but everyone was staring at the TV in shock. I heard the door open and was guessing Dr. Wolf walked back in. She coughed and pulled everyone's attention to her.

"I have some news," she sounded uneasy. "Cameron had a miscarriage," she said.

-Page Break-

I was sitting on the roof outside of Madame Dabney's classroom humming softly to the music I was so use to hearing. I don't come up here so I doubt anyone would look here, so I lie back and stare at the moon. I knew my dad wasn't looking at it. I knew he was dead. But I couldn't help but wish he was.

I heard footsteps behind me but I half expected them so I didn't jump.

"Hey Joe," I say and as he sat down next to me, staring at the moon with me. We stayed silent for a few minutes.

"I'm sorry Cam," he said turning to me.

"Me too," I sigh and look at the constellations.

"Why are you sorry?" he asked looking at me like I had two heads.

"For this," I stood up and walked to the edge, turned towards him, spread my arms wide and fell backwards, humming my song loudly. I saw his eyes widen as he quickly got up to catch me, but he was too late.

I was falling.

I was humming.

I was gonna see my daddy.

I was happy.

I woke up screaming. I heard the heart monitor pick up as my heart started beating franticly. I started breathing really heavy as everyone rushed into my room. They looked as frantic as I felt. I tried to calm my breathing. I couldn't slow down my heart beat. My hand clutched at my heart and I heard the monitor as it had a steady 'beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep' noise going off and my eyes rolled back again.

**A/N Angst-y. I've had this story for a while and decided to post it. I'll think about continuing.**


	2. Chapter 2

-Page Break-

_I heard weak beeping. I opened my eyes and saw everyone was crying. I looked to wear the beeping was coming from and saw a heart monitor. I looked down and saw myself hooked up to it. I then looked into the mirror and saw a faded version of myself. I brought a hand to my cheek and felt myself. I was there. I then brought the same hand and felt my cheek on the Me in the hospital bed. I didn't feel her._

_I looked around the room and saw everyone was looking at her and had tears rolling down their faces. I also noticed that Grant, Jonas and Zach were here._

_Another exchange maybe?_

_I saw even Joe was crying._

"_Joe?" I asked but he kept looking at the Me in the bed. I walked up to him and touched his cheek but he didn't move his gaze from the Me in the bed._

'_So this is an out of body experience?' I asked myself. My eyes rolled back._

My eyes fluttered open but I couldn't move my body. I heard some gasps and footsteps. I watched the ceiling. I still heard the weak beeping. It was an eerie noise and I didn't like it. I looked at Zach.

"Is there another exchange?" he looked at me confused. He probably wasn't expecting that to be the first thing I ask after everything that happened. He nodded at me.

"Yeah, Gallagher girl," I looked back at the ceiling. I started to get feeling back so I leaned up, only to get pushed back down by Joe.

"You need to stay down," he said and I shook my head.

"I want to walk around," I said and sat up again. Zach pushed me down this time and I glared at the ceiling. "How long was I out?" I asked.

"Four days," Mom said a tucked a strand of hair behind my ear.

"Four day, 3 hours, 42 minutes, 16 seconds to be exact," Liz mumbled quietly. I smiled softly, same old Liz.

"Alright," I said slowly. Then leaned up and pushed away Joe and Zach's hands. "I'm going to go walking around; and you can come if you want to but I'm going either way," I said and got up, I grabbed the booty shorts and spaghetti strap top Catherine gave me and put on the shorts before turning away from everyone and taking off the hospital gown and replacing it with my top.

Catherine gave them to me before throwing me out of the torture house, might as well call them mine.

I walked out of the room and went to get food. When I walked in the Dining Hall I saw it was dinner and everyone was looking at me. I ignored all of them and went to the kitchen. No one went with me, so I decided to get food and go back to the hospital wing. When I walked out of the Dining Hall I felt someone wrap their arms around me from behind. They were arms I had come to know but weren't ones I liked.

"Miss me?" the voice whispered before nibbling my ear. I dropped the tray of food and was about to scream when they put a gag in my mouth and stuck a napotine patch on my arm.

-Page Break-

I had a major headache. I opened my eyes and looked around the room. I saw a music box in the corner. The room was solid rock so it was obviously soundproof. There was dusty shag carpet under me. There was a table next to the music box and was probably covered with knifes there was a camera with a blinking red light to my right, telling me it was on and recording already. She wasn't even trying to hide it this time. My clothes were next to the camera.

My arms were chained and my neck had a collar around it, it was probably chained too. I was on my knees and saw I was naked and my thighs had chains too.

Catherine and the guy walked in from the door across the room, in front of me. He was in his boxers again and she was dressed in all black. He walked to the table and she walked to the music box and turned it on.

"Can we please not have the music on this time?" I asked sweetly. She glanced at me and picked up a knife. She smiled at me when she kneeled to my level.

"Cameron, this camera is recording live," she said gesturing to the camera I had noticed earlier. "The video feed is being set to your mother's computer as we speak, she was asked before hand to have Joe Solomon, your friends Rebecca, Elizabeth, Macey, Grant and Jonas along with my son Zachary to watch this video," she said with a smile as I glared at her. "Now, because you asked about the music again you know what is going to happen," she smirked evilly and when she brought the knife to my face and I didn't flinch. She sighed and took it away. "You Morgan's' are so hardheaded," she muttered as she sat the knife back on the table and walked out.

The guy walked up to me and smiled before kneeling to my level and taking my chin, forcing me to look at him.

"What should we do first?" he asked and kissed me. I didn't kiss back, he pulled away.

"Go to Hell," I grumbled to him. He swiftly brought the knife he had been holding to my neck and pressed down but I didn't flinch.

"You wanna play the tough girl act? Huh?" he taunted but I didn't respond; I glared harder. "Oh, I'm going to enjoy this," he smirked and walked over to the table.

I leaned forward to see how far I could reach. I went forward a few inches but not a lot. I brought my hands forward and it brought my neck back some. That told me that my arm chains and neck chain connected. I wiggled my feet and felt that they were shackled and chained too.

He walked back but without boxers this time.

"Open your mouth," I locked my jaw. He lifted the knife to my cheek and cut it.

I didn't wince.

"Open," he demanded and stuck the knife to my neck.

I didn't.

He pressed down, harder than usual and I hissed in pain and he put a metal ring about two inches in diameter wide in my mouth, it had straps on either side and he tied it around my head. My mouth was stuck open no matter how hard I tried to close it.

He smirked and winked at me before he licked my lips. I leaned my head back only to fall backwards onto my back. It hurt because my arms were in the air and my legs were in an odd position. He got over me and started kissing me with tongue. He pulled back and grabbed something on the collar and pulled me up. I glanced down and saw something like a hoop.

I promise myself I won't make a sound or cry with this being a live video that everyone is watching.

"You want a toy or the real thing?" he asked playfully.

I didn't respond.

He smirked and shrugged. "Real thing it is," he said wickedly. He stood and put himself in my mouth. I glared the whole time. He thrust into me repeatedly and moaned loudly before cumming in my mouth. I couldn't spit it out because the gag thing so I held my breath and kept the stuff where it was, refusing to swallow. He sat in front of me, a look of amusement on his face. "You'll have to swallow at some point," he smirked.

I turned away from him. The sad thing is though, I turned towards the camera. I was glaring at the floor and felt my lungs burn from lack of air. He chuckled after 3 minutes and 32 seconds.

"Your face is turning purple, just swallow so we can finish," he said and I glared at the floor harder. I started to feel light-headed. After another full minute I swallowed my pride along with the cum and inhaled deeply before coughing a little. "That was hot," he snorted. "Let's continue, shall we," I glared daggers at him. He pushed me back onto my back. I tried to head butt him but he moved his head back before it connected. He smirked at me. "Nice try," then he stuck his tongue back in my mouth.

I hate this.

He started to finger me and it hurt because I wasn't wet but that didn't matter because after a bit I _was_ wet and he smirked at me. I glared at him as he licked his finger. He picked up my lower body by the back of my thighs and started slamming my body onto his as he raped me. My feet were pulled to the side and my arms were in the air.

I couldn't close my mouth to keep from screaming so I took deep breaths, after a few minutes it turned to ragged breaths and I was terrified that I would moan.

I didn't want to moan.

I don't like him. I hate him. But that didn't mean the friction didn't feel good. I hate him and my body for doing this. I felt the tears fill my eyes but I pushed them away. He kept moaning and biting my neck, leaving hickeys but I refused to give him the satisfaction of making me moan.

I stayed silent.

We came but I just closed my eyes. I didn't make a noise. He dropped me back to the ground and pulled the hoop on my collar to lift me up again.

I felt the sticky cum drip out of me.

"Whore," he muttered then licked my tongue.

He got up and put his boxers back on before he walked to the wall and pulled a switch, my legs got lifted above me and I fell forward. I turned my arm slightly so I would land on it rather than my face and bit down on the ring and squeezed my eyes shut as I was slightly dragged across the floor until I was hanging upside down. He walked out of the room.

I waited 5 seconds and started swinging back and forth. When I got high enough I started to arch my back and swung right-side up. I quickly grabbed the chains holding me and looked at the locks. They were standard locks and I could pick them no problem. I started feeling around in my hair and thanked God that there was a bobby-pin hanging it loosely. I started picking the locks. I got my wrists unhooked and started on the collar. I got it done with a little difficulty but not much. I started to work on the ones on my thighs and ankles, hurrying because they could be back any second.

I got them out of the shackles and untied the gag before dropping to the ground. I rushed to my clothes and put them on. I picked the camera up and looked at it.

"See you soon," I whispered with a smile and took out the batteries.

-Meanwhile-

Rachel Morgan walked to her computer and saw an e-mail. It was from Catherine Goode and untraceable. It read: _Get Joseph Solomon, Rebecca Baxter, Elizabeth Sutton, Macey McHenry, Grant Newman, Jonas Anderson and my son Zachary Goode to watch the live feed of your daughter Cameron. Once they are in the room, the video will open._

Rachel's eyes went wide as she rushed into the Dining Hall and got them before they all rush back to the office. The feed started. They saw Cammie looking around the room, on her knees and chained up, completely naked.

Catherine and the boy from last time walked in without a word. Catherine started playing music and the guy went to a table.

"Can we please not have the music on this time?" Cammie asked. Catherine walked to the table and picked up a knife before walking to Cammie and kneeling to her level.

"Cameron, this camera is recording live," she said gesturing to the camera. "The video feed is being set to your mother's computer as we speak, she was asked before hand to have Joe Solomon, your friends Rebecca, Elizabeth, Macey, Grant and Jonas along with my son Zachary to watch this video," she said with a smile as Cammie glared at her. "Now, because you asked about the music again you know what is going to happen," she smirked evilly when she brought the knife to Cammie's face but she didn't flinch. Catherine sighed and took it away. "You Morgan's' are so hardheaded," she muttered as she sat the knife back on the table and walked out.

They guy walked up and kneeled to Cam's level and took her chin, forcing her to look at him.

Liz had walked to the other side of the room and started crying. Jonas ran to comfort her.

"What should we do first?" he asked and kissed her. She didn't kiss back. Everyone had emotionless masks on their faces as they watched.

"Go to Hell," she muttered when he pulled away. He pulled a knife to her neck but she didn't flinch.

"That explains the marks on her neck," Joe muttered.

"You wanna play the tough girl act? Huh?" he taunted and she glared harder. "Oh, I'm going to enjoy this," he smirked and walked to the table. He took his boxers off and picked up a gag from the table. While he did that Cammie was studying the chains holding her, seeing how far they went and what they did.

He walked back to her.

"Open your mouth," he said and she locked her jaw. He cut her cheek but she didn't wince. "Open," he demanded and put the knife to her neck, when she didn't he pressed down, making her hiss in pain. He took the opportunity to put the ring gag in her mouth and tied it around her head. He smirked and winked before licking her lips.

Mrs. Morgan got up and walked to the other side of the room, Macey following her.

Cammie leaned away from him and fell backwards. Her arms were in the air and her legs were beside her back. He leaned over her and stuck his tongue in her mouth.

Grant walked away.

He grabbed the ring on her collar and pulled her up.

"You want a toy or the real thing?" he asked with a smirk and she glared at him. He shrugged. "Real thing it is," he said and put himself in her mouth before thrusting into her.

Bex walked away.

He came in her mouth but she didn't swallow. He sat back and watched her with amusement on his face. "You'll have to swallow at some point," he smirked and watched. She turned away from him and towards the camera, glaring at the floor. Her face was turning from a red to a purple and Joe and Zach started to get nervous. After 3 minutes and 32 seconds he laughed. "Your face is turning purple, just swallow so we can finish," he said and she glared harder.

After another minute, her face was a sick shade of blue and she swallowed before taking a deep breath and coughing a bit. "That was hot," he snorted. "Let's continue, shall we," he smirked as she glared at him. He pushed her back and she tried to head butt him but he moved away just in time. "Nice try," he smirked and started kissing her again before he started to finger her. She glared at him as he licked his finger. He then picked her up by her thighs and started slamming her on him.

Joe walked away. Zach could bring himself to look away, from pure horror of what might happen if he wasn't looking.

He kept moaning and biting her neck while she took deep breaths, they soon turn to ragged breaths. Zach saw tears fill her eyes but she blinked them away. He moaned as he came and she closed her eyes for a moment.

He dropped her onto the ground and lifted her by the ring in her collar. Zach felt sick as he saw cum drip out of her.

"Whore," he whispered before he licked her tongue. He got up and put his boxers back on before walking to wall and pulling a switch.

The chains started moving and Cammie started to fall forwards as her legs lifted into the air. She twisted and fell on her arm rather than her face. She closed her eyes and bit the gag as she slid across the ground and into the air, hanging upside down, in the middle of the concrete room.

He walked out.

She waited 5 seconds before she started to swing back and forth. When she started getting higher she arched her back and went upright before quickly grabbing the chains. She looked at the locks for a second before she brought her hand to her hair and pulling out a bobby-pin.

"Hey she's getting out!" Zach said to them and they all rushed back to the screen to see her start to unlock her collar. She undid her thigh and ankle chains before untying the gag and dropping to the ground. She ran towards the camera and picked something up before picking up the camera a few seconds later. She was wearing clothes again. She looked into the camera, at them.

"See you soon," she whispered and smiled before the screen went black.

"She is definitely a Morgan," Joe said as he looked at the blank screen. They all jumped when it came back to life and Cammie's face was looking at them.

-Back to Cam's POV-

I put the batteries back into the camera and looked at it. "Thought it would be better if you knew where I was so you could find me easier," I explained. I paused for a moment before I spoke again. "I'm sorry you had to see that," I whispered to the camera as tears started to sting my eyes.

I blinked them away again and started towards the door.


	3. Chapter 3

I grabbed the handle and paused. I'm the chameleon; I need to look for passageways first! I scolded myself. I started looking at all the walls, studying them closely, when I verified there were no passageways I turned the knob, ever so slowly. The door opened to a large hallway with two doors at the end. This could either be a 50-50 shot or a death wish for me.

I took my chances, knowing I didn't want the people I care for to see anything horrible happen to me for a third time. I walked down the hallway silently and swiftly. Checking for passageways and holding the camera the whole time. I saw a passage way so I pushed my toe into the slight decline in the floor and stepped in. It closed just as I heard Catherine's high heels click down the hallway along with my rapist's bare feet pad passed me.

I felt around the passage and saw it was just a small room, no bigger than two people could fit in. I inwardly sighed but then I heard alarms blaring, I knew this would happen when they reached my room and saw I was no longer there.

"Find her! I don't care!" Catherine shouted as she approached. "Dead or alive, I don't care at this point!" she shouted louder as she walked by me, my rapist's footsteps close behind. I heard a door slam but didn't hear footsteps. I sat the camera down.

I searched for another passageway, something, I needed a way out because there wasn't any way I was going to be able to get out the same way I got in, because it wouldn't open back up, I tried. I felt around, desperate for a way out.

I found nothing.

I slumped to the floor and waited.

There were footsteps now.

Is it bad I was hoping they would look here?

I looked around the dark room I was sitting in, looking for something more. I looked at the corners, the cracks, everywhere. I started running my hands along the dirt ground, counting the minutes.

After three hours I was starting to feel more desperate than ever but refused to give myself away. Joe would be disappointed. I lay down on my stomach and started drawing into the dirt. Then something occurred to me…this is dirt. I started feeling the walls, one was concrete, soundproof, and the rest were dirt.

I smiled.

I leaned back onto the wall and put a foot to the dirt wall and pushed both ways. I felt it give a bit and pushed harder. I was having trouble breathing. I must be running out of air. I pushed harder, lifting my other foot and pushed with all my force.

I felt it give.

I fell to the ground next to the camera as the dirt walls fell.

I smiled wider and grabbed the camera.

I ran through the woods. I stepped on multiple thorns and stumbled on slick ground but kept going, holding the tiny camera in my hands as I went.

I saw a cabin in the woods and froze.

Isn't that Joe's cabin?

I watched where I ran; avoiding any trip wires that did God knows what and motion sensors. When I reach the clearing of the cabin I walked with caution. I walked to the back door and peeked in the window. I saw no one. I went around to another window and again saw no one.

I did the only thing that would clear my conscious on whether the cabin was empty or not: I knocked on the front door. I sat the camera to the side, next to the wall and knocked.

A big guy in black answered the door, _dumbass_. He looked taken aback and I quickly grabbed his shoulder and brought him to me as I punched him in the face. He was dazed so I stepped back and roundhouse kicked him. He fell to the ground unconscious.

I grabbed his gun.

I'm not sure why I got the gun but my body is on autopilot at the moment as I checked the rooms of the cabin, gun in hand. There was a guy in the bedroom; he was searching under the bed, his back to me. He brought his head out and I shot. It hit him right in the middle of his forehead. I quickly grabbed the guy from the porch and dragged him inside. I picked up the camera and walked back in. I saw a shadow from the kitchen and sat the camera down as I cocked the gun and walked to the kitchen.

I peeked in and saw a woman; she was fugly and scary skinny. She had knifes everywhere and was wearing a Circle ring. I shot her dead. She fell to the ground and I dragged her into the room as well. I checked the other rooms. There was nobody else there. I looked into their ears for comms units.

I didn't find any.

I picked up the camera.

"I'm at Joe's cabin," I said after I turned it on. Then I realized I turned it off, not on…

And they saw everything that just happened…

Oh God…

I turned it back on.

"I'm at Joe's cabin," I said again. I sat the camera down, still on and looked at the gun. It was a 9mm handgun with a silencer attached. I fingered the gun that I know I had no idea about but still managed to kill three professionals with. The door burst open and I pointed the gun at whoever came in.

I sighed and smiled when I saw who it was.

Joe.

I sat the gun down and ran into his arms. He caught me and hugged me back but looked uneasy. I understood after everything I had been through. He was still stiff as I sighed but stayed in his arms.

"How much did you see?" I asked him.

"How did you learn to do that?" he asked. He was referring to the gun.

"I don't have any clue," I said. He pulled back and looked into my eyes, to see if I was lying. He nodded and picked me up again, hugging me.

"It's ok to cry Cam," he told me.

"No, it's not," I said with a hard voice and pulled back. I picked up the camera that has yet to be turned off. I smiled into it. "See you soon," I said and turned it off before sitting it on the ground and shooting it. There was a tracker on it that I couldn't get out.

I turned to Joe who had a poker face on. I put the safety on the gun and removed the silencer before tucking it in the back of my shorts and walking out. I saw Joe's car and got in, waiting for him. He got in and drove back to the school.

He didn't say a word the whole ride.

I didn't either.

We pulled up and everyone was already outside, waiting. We got out and no one made a move towards me.

I didn't either.

Everyone stood in place.

I took the gun out from behind me and held it out. "Someone take it," I said. No one moved for it. I sighed and put it back before I walked passed everyone and into the school. I went to change.

When I got in the room, I saw that everything that was mine was perfectly made and in place while everyone else's was askew. I sighed and went to get some underwear and a bra. I got them and stripped of the bad clothes and put them on.

Everyone walked in.

I didn't bother covering up.

They saw everything that was worth hiding already.

I went to the closet and put on a white shirt and sweatpants. They use to fit me nicely, now they were really baggy on me.

I looked down at them and sighed before going into the bathroom. I looked in the mirror and saw my hair was shorted and black. I sighed again and walked back out.

Nobody spoke so I walked out and went to get something to eat. I haven't eaten in a while obviously. It was about 1 in the morning so it wasn't a surprise to see it was empty and void of all life. I left the gun in the room on my bed. I heard movement behind me but didn't bother looking.

It was either someone coming to check on me or someone from the Circle.

Honestly I was too tired and weak to care.

"You're getting sloppy Gallagher girl," Zach joked, walking up beside me.

"Thanks," I shrugged. He stopped walking when I said that but I continued and walked into the kitchen. I looked through the cabinets and found some crackers. I grabbed those and ate a three before I felt full; not good.

I put them back and walked out. I saw everyone was their now. I stopped and looked at them expectantly.

They said nothing.

I walked past them and went to the hospital wing. I walked into my usual room and got into the bed and fell asleep there.

-Page Break-

I woke attached to things and heard beeping.

I knew this would happen. That's why I went into here to sleep.

"Morning, any of you gonna talk to me today or do I still get silence?" I asked, not even opening my eyes. I got no answer and shrugged. I lie back and listen to the beeping.

I tried to see how long I could hold my breath after half an hour of pacing feet.

The beeping sped up and I heard the footsteps stop.

I forgot about the beeping.

I started to breathe again, didn't want to scare them too much, and decided to sleep instead.

I dissevered that at least.

-Page Break-

I woke up, still to the beeping but didn't bother opening my eyes or mouth, they wouldn't talk to me.

"Hello Cameron," came Catherine's voice, along with muffled ones in the background.


	4. Chapter 4

"_Hello Cameron," came Catherine's voice, along with muffled ones in the background._

"Hi Cathy," I said then yawned, not bothering to open my eyes. The muffled noises stopped.

"I like that welcome much more than silence," she said in a happy voice.

"That's nice," I replied back.

"You know Cameron, it's very rude to talk to an elder that way," she replied with a stern voice.

"You're not an elder, you have a good two or three years left," I replied with a smirk. I felt something cut my arm but I didn't flitch. I took it. When my arm stopped being cut I spoke again. "You'll have to try harder than that," I sing with a smirk on my face.

"Do you have a death wish or something?" she asked, sounding shocked.

"So what if I do?" I asked her with a shrug.

"So you do?" she inquired.

"I didn't say that," I responded.

"So you don't?" she asked.

"I didn't say that," I responded again.

"You are a pain in the ass Morgan," she sighed.

"I try," I shrug and smile. I open my eye and take out all of the needle sticking in me, not really caring. I look at the cut on my arm and snort. I stand up and look around the room. Joe, Mom, Bex, Liz, Macey, Grant, Jonas and Zach were all hog tied and gagged in the corner, looking scared. I looked at Catherine. "Let them live and I'll go without a fight," I said monotone.

They started squirming and shaking their heads but Catherine smiled.

"Let them live and leave them alone and I won't fight at all," I said when I saw mischief in her eyes. They squirmed more.

"I'll take that deal Cameron," she said and put a knife on the ground for them.

"Untie Elizabeth, she can get the rest after we have left the perimeter," Catherine said and walked out. I untied Liz and took the duct tape off of everyone's mouths.

"Don't go Cam, please don't!" Joe begged and I looked at him with a poker face.

"I'm sorry," I whispered and looked away. I looked back and saw they all had tears streaming down their faces. "I love you," I said and gave a weak smile before walking out without looking back, if I did, I would break down and I can't do that. I left the door open. Catherine smiled and threw her arm over my shoulder and pointed a gun at my head. I heard Liz yelp before crying harder.

I knew it was just so she could get out no problem.

But Liz didn't know that.

She's the smartest but, sadly, is the most naïve of us all.

"We love you Cammie!" she said, but her voice cracked and I heard her slump to the floor in sobs.

"Do you hear the music Cammie?" Catherine asked with a smile. I did but she didn't need to know that. "It's a lovely melody, isn't it?" she asked and started humming. I heard some gasps from the room. Two to be exact. "Answer or I'll shoot you," she threatened, talking darker.

"Then it would be a lose-lose, now wouldn't it?" I shot back. She smiled and shot the gun. I felt a sting in my thigh. I looked down and then back at her. 'Is it a good thing or a bad thing that it doesn't hurt?' I asked myself, serious.

Liz was screaming and everyone else was frantic to get out of the ropes.

"Walk," she said and pointed the gun at me. I sighed and walked ten paces forward and then walked back. I didn't limp or wince but I felt the blood seeping from the bullet hole in the side of my thigh and into my grey sweatpants.

"I'm gonna wrap this," I said and walked back into the room. I grabbed some gauze and tape to wrap my leg. When everyone saw my pants they looked scared.

"Cam, what do you feel?" Macey asked me. I didn't respond for a moment, I was thinking, after a while I sighed.

"Numb," I said quietly.

"I'm sorry Cam," she whispered. I finished wrapping my leg and stood up.

"Me too," I whispered and walked towards the door. Catherine pointed the gun and me and walked towards me. I stopped a few steps in front of the door. She placed the gun on my chest and applied pressure, so I stepped back and she kept the gun on me. I remained with an emotionless expression.

"Cameron, it's no fun if you don't play the part of the helpless, emotional hostage," Catherine complained, keeping the gun to my chest.

"Sorry," I muttered, not really caring.

"Liar," she hissed and pressed harder.

"How'd you know?" I asked mock-shock. She glared and shot my arm. I didn't flitch.

"Now I gotta wrap this," I sigh. She looked shocked.

"How does that now hurt?" she whispered.

"Guess you broke me," I shrugged as I turned to get the gauze and tape again.

"If I broke you would look like your father, not like a fucking robot that can't feel anything!" she shouted at me. I turned to her. In an instant I took the gun from her and pointed it at her.

Everyone looked shocked and slightly scared.

"You are a heartless bitch," I said and shot her thigh, where she shot me, she winced and grabbed her leg. "You do horrible things to good people for the fun of it," I shot her arm and she cried out in pain, grabbed her arm with her good arm, gripping her leg with the other. I pointed it at her head. "Should I continue?" I asked coldly.

She had fear in her eyes.

"Sit on the bed," I said and she limped over to the bed. "Lizzie, please untie everyone and get CIA down here," I said in a sweet voice. I heard her hurry and untie everyone. They kept away from me and Mom went with Liz to call the Director.

"Cammie, put the gun down," Joe said and I gripped it harder, making Catherine flinch.

"Gallagher girl, put it down and we can take care of her," Zach said as he walked over to me slowly.

"Stop it. I'm not some crazy person that could snap at any second. I'm a girl on a mission," I said in a weak voice.

"What mission Cam?" Bex asked, choosing her words carefully.

"That mission is to keep everyone I love and care for safe," I said as a tear ran down my face, Catherine smirked as I wiped it away.

"Maybe not completely broken," she said to me.

"Stop talking!" I shouted at her as more tears came and she stood up. I shot her other leg and she fell back down. Tears blurred my vision but I kept the gun aimed at her form. I felt some one behind me.

"Miss me?" a voice asked.

"Not really," I said in a cold voice. I felt him wrap his arms around me. I elbowed him. I felt the air shift as he swung his hand at me. I ducked from his hit and kept the gun at Catherine.

It's like everything was slow-mo.

I glanced down and saw he had a gun.

I took a risk.

I grabbed at his gun and caught it. I pointed it at him and the other at Catherine, looking between them. Mom and Liz came back in with some guards. They all paused at the door to watch the scene before them.

"Someone could help," I commented quietly. Everyone seemed to break from whatever trace they were in and helped. Zach and Joe took my rapist out of the room, none to gently and the guards got Catherine. She smiled as she was carried out.

"Remember the music, Cameron," she said before she was out of the room.

I put the guns on the bed and sat down. Zach and Joe walked back in and looked at me along with everyone else in the room, again with the silent treatment. I got up and walked out. I saw Dr. Wolf down a hallway with a nurse and walked to them.

"Dr. Wolf, I need you to get two bullets out of me," I told her once she turned to me. I gestured to my thigh and arm. I noticed the bullet in my arm was in the cut. She looked scared and they got me on a gurney for immediate surgery.

I had a mask on my face and was rushed passed the room just as everyone was walking out.

They looked scared.

They need to hide their emotions better.

I need to get some sleep.

I smiled at them and closed my eyes.

I need to defeat the Circle.

I need to know why Catherine needs me so badly.

I need the music to stop playing.

-Page Break-

_When I woke up I heard nothing but soft cries and whimpering. I saw myself in the bed again but this time it was different. Zach was sitting next me and holding my hand._

_He had tears in his eyes._

_I noticed how pale I was._

_How I wasn't hooked up to any machines._

_How my chest wasn't rising and falling._

…_I was dead…_

-Page Break-

My eyes opened and I gasped for air. My hands gripped whatever they were holding.

My lungs burned from lack of oxygen.

I was staring at the ceiling as I felt tears sting my eyes.

I was still gasping for air.

I heard the doors burst open but was too busy trying to breathe to notice.

Someone placed an oxygen mask over my face.

I started to breath slower. Normal.

My eyes felt heavy but I wasn't tired.

I heard the beeping noise again.

When did they hook me back up?

I let go of whatever my hands had been gripping and closed my eyes.

My body ached.

"Cam?" a weak voice asked me. I think it was Macey.

"Hmm?" I asked back. I sounded hoarse.

"We're sorry," she said and I felt a soft hand graze my cheek, brushing hairs out of my face. I think it was my mom.

"Ok," I whispered.

"What can you feel?" a frail voice asked. Liz?

"Nothing... Everything... Numb," I sighed. I opened my eyes. "I'm going to sit up, don't push me down," I said and then sat up; Zach flinched slightly when I winced but didn't push me down. "Is anyone other than Macey or Liz going to talk to me, because so far they are the only ones who seem to have a voice at the moment," I said. Everyone looked at me.

Nobody spoke so I turned to Macey and Liz who were hugging each other.

"Can you die my hair back?" I asked her. She smiled and I smiled back. I got up and noticed I was in someone else's sweats. They were Liz'. They were still baggy. "_Damn_," I muttered and walked over to them. I linked arms with both of them and turned to Bex. "Do you want to come?" I asked her sweetly and softly.

She looked at me for a second before she shook her head. I sighed,

"Alright," we walked away.

We went up to the room and Macey bleached my hair while Liz talked about what we had been learning in class and the latest rumors from Tina. I laughed a little at some of them.

"Done," Macey said and I looked into the mirror. It was almost its usual color and it was getting longer. I also noticed some hickeys on my neck.

"Want to do my makeup?" I asked her. She beamed and nodded quickly and rushed out of the room to get her makeup bags. "Lizzie, do you want to do my hair?" I asked when I saw her sitting on the rim of the tub. She smiled and nodded.

I was being set on a stool while Macey did my makeup and Liz did my hair. We talked and had fun.

"Why is everyone but you two ignoring me?" I asked them.

"Well, something bad happened to you when you got back and then you got taken again," Macey said.

"Yeah, I had a miscarriage, but why aren't they talking?" I asked and they looked taken aback that I knew. Oh yeah, I was supposed to be unconscious.

"They might be scared of how you'll react if they accidently bring it up, and you were legally dead for three minutes," Liz said.

"Oh, ok," I said and they finished. I looked in the mirror and saw that my cuts, hickeys, and everything was covered and I looked somewhat normal again, just skinnier. I smiled and hugged them. "I love you guys," I whispered to them. They hugged me back.

"We love you too," they said and we all started to cry into the hug.

"C'mon, let's get you some food, you look skinny," Liz said as we carefully wiped our eyes and we all laughed that Liz called someone skinny. We walked down and saw everyone else was already in the Dining Hall eating.

I was smiling and laughing like nothing was wrong. I got my food and when I was about to sit with Macey and Liz, Joe walked up to me.

"Cameron, can you come with me? Bring your food," he said and started walking towards the door. I followed without arguing, but I sat my food down, I wasn't feeling hungry. We walked to Mom's office and when he looked back at me for the first time, he looked worried. "Where's your food?" he asked.

"I'm not hungry," I said dismissively. He sighed and walked in.

"Hey kiddo," Mom smiled from her desk.

"Hey Mom," I smiled. I saw Dr. Steve sitting on the couch. "Hi, Dr. Steve," I waved with my smile still in place.

"Cam, we have some disturbing news to tell you. When you came back and passed out we rushed you to the hospital wing. After the tape Dr. Wolf came in and-" I cut her off.

"I know about the miscarriage," I said and they all looked shocked.

"How?" Joe asked, composing himself.

"I heard when she walked in, I wasn't completely out. I could still hear," I said.

"Oh…" was all they said.

"Dr. Sanders is here because we want you to have counseling about what happened," Mom said, ignoring when he corrected her, saying 'Dr. Steve'. I nodded.

"Ok," I said.

"Now, please eat something, Liz' clothes are big on you," Mom pleaded. I laughed lightly and smiled.

"Alright," I said and walked out. I went to my room and went to sleep, not eating.


	5. Chapter 5

I got out of bed and walked into the bathroom.

I stripped my clothes and got into the shower.

I washed my hair and body, careful of the bullet holes, cuts and scratches.

I got out and dried off.

I put on my uniform that was hanging on my body.

I walked out of the room, leaving my sleeping roommates behind without a word.

I walked into the Dining Hall and saw it was empty, guess I'm the first to be up.

I walked into the kitchen and ate some crackers, like before, and put them back.

I walked back out and started to walk around the school.

I ended up in the P&E barn.

I started humming.

I walked to a punching bag and pushed it lightly with my hand. I watched as it swung back and forth, slowly. I pushed a bit harder and it swung a bit more. I just watched as it swung. I thought about what Catherine had down to me. What she had other people do to me. She didn't asked questions; she just wanted a response from me.

I felt tears sting my eyes.

She had treated my father much worse. She had killed him for not talking. She killed him, but she released me. She played me.

I looked at the bag when it stopped.

I hummed louder.

I screamed in frustration and punched for all I was worth.

The bag broke off and flew back a bit before it hit the ground.

I felt the tears stream down my face as I looked at the bag.

I hummed softly.

I turned away from the bag and when I looked at the door to the barn I saw Joe, Zach, Bex, Liz, Macey, Grant, Jonas and Mom standing there, staring at me.

I stopped the tears and hid my emotions.

I stopped humming.

Macey and Liz ran to me and pulled me into a hug.

I flinched.

They back away, looking worried.

All the other ran over when then saw Macey and Liz back away.

"Cam…" Liz reached a hand out to me and I flinched again. Everyone looked shocked. Even I was shocked.

"I-I'll go see Dr. Steve now," I muttered softly and walked away without another word. I looked at my feet the whole way there. I felt eyes on me. I spun around, ready to fight. When I saw it was Joe and Zach I relaxed a little, but I was still tense.

"Cam," Joe walked up to me a bit and I tensed up more. I felt my eyes widen a bit and I backed up. He noticed and took a step back, holding his hands in surrender. "Cam, why are you humming?" he asked softly.

I was humming?

"I can't get the song out of my head," I whispered.

Their eyes widened.

Zach took a step forward and I took two back.

He looked hurt.

"Gallagher girl," Zach whispered.

He eyes got glassy.

His breathing got slower and deeper; he was trying not to cry.

I rushed over to him and hugged him. I don't want him to be hurt because of me. I reached over and pulled Joe into the hug. They were tense for a moment before they hugged me back, tighter.

"I'm sorry," I whispered to them.

"Shhh, its ok Cam," they hushed me, rubbing my back gently.

I heard the song start to play in my head and I swayed to the music. I started to hum softly.

They pulled back, looking scared. I stopped humming and swaying to look at them curiously.

"What?" I asked. Joe grabbed my shoulders and got eye level with me. Something dawned on me then. "When did you get out of the coma?" I asked.

"You _just_ noticed I wasn't in a coma?" he asked, slight amusement on his features, only slightly.

"That didn't answer my question," I said.

"That didn't answer mine," he matched. I rolled my eyes and smiled slightly.

"Cameron," someone called behind us. I turned and walked to Dr. Steve but stopped short. I turned back and flung myself in Zach's arms. I wrapped my arms around him neck and he wrapped his around my smaller-than-usual waist.

I kissed him.

He seemed shocked because he didn't respond at first but did shortly after that. After 13 seconds of kissing, I pulled back and smiled at him before I walked back to Dr. Steve. He smiled at me before he turned to his office with me tailing him.

I brought my hand to my lips and smiled a bit. I missed Zach's kisses. They were always so soft and full of love.

"Cameron?" Dr. Steve asked. I looked at him, I then realized we were already in his office and I was sitting down on the widow seat.

"Yes?" I asked.

"We have been in here all day; do you still want to stay?" He asked, he sounded as if that wasn't the first time he had asked, it sounded like he had said it multiple times and he was getting tired.

"Oh, no, I'm good," I said and got up. "Thank you, I'll see you tomorrow," I said with a smile and walked to the door. I opened it and ducked just as a fist was about to bash into my head, I grabbed the fist and flipped the person over my head before I stepped onto their chest.

"Wait!" multiple voices shouted. I stopped and looked down. It was Bex. I quickly let go and helped her up.

"Oh my God! Bex, I am _soo_ sorry," I apologized. She seemed a little shaken and that scared me more than anything. Bex is the toughest girl I know, she doesn't get shaken over many things. I stepped back before I took off in a full fledged run. I ran passed everyone at top speed, which is pretty fast by the way, and ran out of the school. Ran passed all the girls in the P&E barn, passed the guards trying to grab me, passed the gates, passed my old life.

I ran.

I ran away.

For the second time.

There was a Gallagher van following me.

I ran faster.

The van was having trouble catching up with me.

I ran into Roseville.

I ran through crowds of people.

I ran through traffic.

I ran into the park.

I ran into someone.

We both fell.

I looked down and saw who I ran into.

Josh.

"Hey Cammie," he said a little breathlessly. I guess I knocked the air out of him.


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N I feel like the last chapter was more of a filler than anything, it was sort of bleh XP sooooo I hope this one is better! REVIEW!**

I didn't move.

I stared at him, wide eyed. His hands were around my waist and I was on top of him, straddling him. But I couldn't move.

"Cammie?" a girl asked. I think it was DeeDee, but I couldn't move.

"What are _you_ doing here?" a male voice seethed. I think it was Dillon.

I then remembered that I was running.

I blinked.

I quickly got off Josh and helped him up.

"Hey, sorry, um, I have to go," I said.

I saw a black van stop beside us and Catherine got out of it, smirking.

What the hell?!

I ran.

She and 3 other guys started running after me, pushing people out of their way to get closer.

To get to me.

Leaving school was a _very_ bad idea.

I saw the Gallagher van driving around, looking for me. I ran faster. The side door opened as it moved. Zach's face looked terrified.

I felt fingers scratch my shoulder blade and tear my uniform.

I ran faster.

I was starting to get so fast I was tripping over my feet from not being able to pick them back up fast enough, but I kept going.

I got closer to the van as it moved and jumped in. I smashed into the other side and tipped the van a bit before it went back onto all its wheels. I gritted my teeth but didn't say a word.

"Why did you leave the school?!" Bex shouted at me. I stopped gritting my teeth and looked at her. She looked pissed. I saw her face soften so I know my face looked pathetic. I covered my emotions when I remembered my shoulder.

I felt blood.

I stayed up against the door. I didn't want them to see my arm.

"Cam, why did you run?" Macey asked. I looked at her, I hurt her too.

"Cammie?" Liz asked softly, but didn't attempt to reach out to me. I looked at her and saw tears in her eyes. I hurt them, all of them. I looked down. Joe turned and it surprised me, my eyes widened and I yelped as I fell to the floor.

"Ow," I muttered softly from the floor.

"Gallagher girl, how fast were you running?" Zach asked as he looked at my arm.

"Not fast enough," I sighed softly, hoping no one heard, but of course everyone heard. Hope is a terrible thing to rely on.

"What do you mean?" Macey asked. They crowded around me. I sighed and sat up before I turned a bit to show them my shirt.

"She almost got me," I whispered. "She almost got me again," I said a bit louder. "Ugh! I hate myself!" I shouted and slammed my head none-too-softly into the door. I closed my eyes. More blood. Great! Note sarcasm. "Joe, I need stitches," I muttered, I opened my eyes and saw everyone's confused faces. I took Zach's hand and brought it to the back of my head.

His eyes widened. He grabbed a cloth and applied pressure to stop the bleeding.

"I'm an idiot," I mumbled. "You know the weirdest part of it all? She doesn't even ask me anything. She just takes me and abuses me, for _no_ reason," I said and sighed.

"What?" Grant asked. Him being like my over protective brother, he was very confused and angry.

"She just asks about my day, abuses me, then leaves me," I say. I pull my knees to my body, bring my arms around them and rest my head on my knees.

The music started.

"Joe, we're being tailed," I said, muffled by my knees. I didn't even have to look up to know that everyone was shocked.

"She's right," he whispered and took a sharp turn, not using his signal I'm sure. I heard horns being honked and tires screeching as they stopped, yep, no signal.

Someone started to clean and stitch the cut on my head from when I hit the door.

The music got louder.

I hummed.

Everyone got quiet as I started to hum louder.

"Cam?"

I swayed to the music.

It got louder.

"Cammie?"

I continued to hum.

"Cameron."

The only thing I could think of was the music in my head and how the beating of my heart matched the melody.

"Cameron Ann Morgan!"

My feet started to tap to the music as it got louder in my head.

No one said anything.

The music in my head went away, along with my humming, swaying and toe tapping.

"Mom?" I asked into my knees.

"Yes?" she asked after a second.

"Can I go see Dr. Steve?" I asked softly. It was silent for a moment.

"Sure kiddo," she said with a slightly relieved voice but I wasn't buying it. She was still hesitant.

I stayed quiet for the rest of the ride, the music a dull noise in the back of my head.

The van stopped so I quickly got up and walked into the school without a word to anyone. I knocked on Dr. Steve's door and it opened a few seconds later.

"Cameron! What a surprise!" he smiled. He didn't sound surprised…whatever, Mom probably told him I was coming.

I smiled and the music started to get really loud when I stepped into his office. I sat in the window seat. I leaned back and closed my eyes as I hummed to the music.

I started to phase out and let the blaring music consume me. My mind was void of all thought.

"Cameron, you seem to enjoy this song," Dr. Steve commented.

I nodded.

"Is it stuck in your head?" he asked.

I nodded.

"Would you do anything to get it out?" he asked.

I nodded.

"_Anything_?" he asked again.

I nodded.

He clapped his hands together and the music stopped. My eyes opened and I sat up straight.

"Excellent!" he smiled. "Come back this time tomorrow," he said and ushered me out of the room. He slammed the door closed. I stood there shocked for a second.

I blinked and noticed everyone was standing there, looking at me.

"How'd it go Cammie?" Liz asked as she timidly stepped forward.

"What time is it?" I asked. They seemed startled by that, I never forget the time. I don't think I had I just wanted to double check.

"1 in the morning exactly," Joe said.

I nodded.

"That's what I thought," I said.

"So, how did it go Cam?" Macey asked.

"How did what go?" I asked.

"Therapy?" she asked, confused by my question.

"Oh! That. It was fine," I said dismissively.

"Are you sure? You were in there for hours," Zach asked. I raised an eyebrow.

"I was? It only felt like a minute," I said to myself as my legs carried me somewhere.

"Where are you going?" Grant called after me. I turned but continued to walk backwards.

"The kitchen, wanna come?" I asked him, knowing how much he liked to eat. He smiled and ran to catch up with me. I laughed slightly and turned.

We walked to the kitchen in silence.

Once we got there Grant started to raid the cabinets while I went to get the crackers. I got a few and sat down on the counter while Grant made him a HUGE sandwich.

"Cam you should eat more than just a few crackers. At least let me make you a sandwich," he offered. I glanced at his and saw it looked pretty good.

"A small one," I sighed and finished my crackers. A few minutes late he had finished his sandwich and mine and we both sat there eating. I only ate half of it before I felt full. I continued to eat it anyways because I would feel bad if Grant made me a sandwich just for me to through away half.

Grant finished his sandwich before I did, which scared me, it was_ really_ big. I finished a little later then yawned.

"You want to stay with us tonight, our room is closer and you looked like you could pass out at any second," he said. I laughed softly and nodded, my eyes closed for a second and I yawned again.

"Lead the way," I said. I took a step and leaned back on the counter before yawning again.

"Ok," he dragged the word out before throwing me over his shoulder. I fell asleep as he carried me.

**GPOV**

"You want to stay with us tonight, our room is closer and you look like you could pass out at any second," I said. Plus we have an extra bed. She laughing lightly and nodded. She closed her eyes yawned.

"Lead the way," she said and took a step forward before leaning on the counter and yawning again.

"Ok," I dragged out and threw her over my shoulder. As I walked to my room Cam started to get heavier. I think she fell asleep on my shoulder. I walked into the room and saw Zach and Jonas were already in there. They saw Cam over my shoulder and got up quickly.

"Is she ok?" They asked at the same time. I laughed a bit.

"Yeah, she was really tired after I forced her to eat a sandwich; she was only eating a few crackers. I offered her to stay in our room because we have an extra bed and she said yes. She started to walk but didn't get very far. I threw her over my shoulder and she fell asleep on the way here," I explained.

I walked over to the spare bed and laid her down. Zach walked over and tucked her under the covers before he kissed her forehead. We all got into our beds and started to fall asleep, and then we heard a whimper.

We all sat up and heard another whimper. We turned to see Cam. Her face was etched in pain and she was biting her lip.

"Please, stop," she whispered. We watched as her face turned from being pained to looking scared. She screamed a blood curdling scream. Jonas ran out to get everyone.

**CPOV**

_I was being put back onto the bed in the basement. My arms and legs were bond to the bed posts again. My clothes were cut and my rapist was licking his lips as his eyes raked over my body._

"_You were my favorite toy," he smirked._

_I whimpered._

_He pulled a fighting dirk off the table and I whimpered again. He walked over to me and cut my stomach, I bit my lip to keep from screaming._

"_Please, stop," I whispered._

_He laughed at my obvious pain._

_He put the knife to my pussy and smirked before he stabbed it in._

_I screamed._

_He pulled it out and stabbed it in again._

_I screamed louder and longer._

_He pulled it out and pushed it in, not stopping, back and forth._

_I felt my insides being torn to pieces and he fucked me with a knife._

_I continued to scream. He pulled it out and walked over to my face. My mouth was open and I was breathing heavily._

_He smirked at me._

"_Wake up Cam," he said as he brought the knife to my throat. "Wake up," he said with more venom in his words. He slit my throat and I screamed again, I felt the blood bubble out of the cut. "WAKE UP!"_

I shot up, still screaming. I stopped screaming and pulled the blanket away quickly to look at my lower regions and stomach. I looked down and saw my skirt was still there and the sheets weren't bloody.

I placed a gentle hand on my stomach and didn't feel any pain.

I brought my hand to my neck and only felt the small scratches that were slowly fading.

My breathing slowed down and I calmed.

I fell back onto my back and sighed in relief.

I felt eyes on me.

I shuddered and turned away from the eyes. I curled into myself and pulled the blanket over myself, hiding, like all chameleons do.

"Cammie?" that was little Lizzie's soft voice. I wanted to respond, but my mouth wouldn't open. My throat had a lump in it and my eyes watered.

I hiccupped.

I started to slightly sob into the blankets that I had around me.

I kept on hiccupping.

"Gallagher girl?" Zach asked.

I didn't respond, I cried a bit harder.

I felt the hot tears streaming down my face, but I stayed silent.

That is, until I sniffled.

The covered were removed and I was being cradled in someone's arms as I cried. I didn't have to look up to know it was Joe. He was rocking me back and forth.

…_Back and forth_…

I cried harder.

It felt so real.

What if they get me again?

What if it happens for real?

I continued to cry and hiccup until I was starting to fall asleep again.

I didn't want to fall asleep again.

I didn't want to have another nightmare.

I wrapped my arms around his neck and cried again.

"I miss my daddy," I sobbed into his shoulder. He held me closer.

"It's ok Cam, he'll be back one day," he reassured but I shook my head and cried harder.

"He isn't coming back, he's never coming back," I sobbed.

"What do you mean kiddo?" Mom asked. I opened my watery eyes and looked at her. I couldn't look her in the eye. I closed them.

"He's dead," I whispered.

"How do you know Cam?" Macey asked as she stepped closer.

"Th-they showed me," I sobbed.


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N the reason the last chapter was more Jommie than Zammie is because Joe and Cammie both miss Matthew (her dad) where as Zach doesn't know her dad nor his own so all he could really do was comfort her unlike Joe who could cry with her and know the feeling. Ok enjoy the chapter!**

"What?" Joe whispered. I nodded.

"I wouldn't do anything for days, eat, drink, talk, make a noise; no matter what they did, so Catherine took me outside and dragged me through the snow to an opening in the trees."

_**FLASHBACK**_

"_Say hi to your _daddy_," she laughed and threw me to the ground, onto his grave. I started digging and crying; trying to see my daddy. My fingers were bleeding and I'm sure I looked like a mess because Catherine kept laughing at me. She grabbed my ankle and pulled me back to the house and pushed me down the stairs._

_I crumbled into a ball on the floor and cried._

"_Worthless," she laughed and kicked me in the stomach. "You wanna see when your _daddy _use to be alive, he had a message for you and your _mother_," she rolled her eyes and laughed again. I looked up at her and nodded. She grabbed my hair and pulled me over to the bed. She then pulled a TV over and played a tape._

"_Cammie, Rachel, this is the last words I'll ever say so I want you both to know that I love you and I hope you have happy lives. And I'm sorry I couldn't finish the mission Joe," he said. He was crying, bloody and nailed to a chair. Then he was shot in the head. I watched, horrified._

_The music was playing loudly in my throbbing head._

_**FLASHBACK OVER**_

I sobbed on Joe's shoulder. I felt some tears on my shoulder and knew Joe was crying too. I was passed to someone else's arms and was being cradled by them. I think it was Mom.

"I'm so sorry you had to see that kiddo," Mom sobbed.

"The music won't go away," I whispered. I looked at Joe. "Make the music go away," I told him and his eyes got watery again.

"I can't do that Cam," he said, shaking his head. I nodded.

"Ok," I whispered and fell asleep in Mom's arms.

-Page Break-

I walked around school all day, not really paying attention, the music in my head made my mind clear. I went where I was supposed to, did as I was told, answered questions I didn't really hear. That was my day. I was now sitting on my bed as my friends slept. I was waiting for it to be 12:55, and then I would walk to Dr. Steve's office.

12:54

One minute left.

12:55

Time to go.

I got up and walked out of the room. I went to Dr. Steve's office and knocked on the door at exactly 1:00 in the morning. He smiled when he opened his door. I walked in and sat down. Once the door was closed the blaring music started and I phased out.

"How was your day Cammie?" he asked.

"I didn't pay attention," I replied.

"Have you been eating?" he asked.

I shook my head.

"Do you remember your summer?" he asked.

I nodded.

"Do you remember what you did before we captured you?" he asked.

I nodded.

"Do you remember when your dad took you to the circus?" he asked.

I nodded.

"Do you remember the dead drop?"

I didn't respond.

"The napkin your dad picked up?" he asked.

I nodded.

"What was on the napkin Cammie?" he asked.

"Names," I responded.

"Whose names?" he asked.

"Circle leaders," I said.

"What are the names?" he asked me.

I started calling out names of people I didn't really know other than Governor Winters.

"Good," he pulled a music box out from under his desk and sat it on top. "You ready to make the music go away?" he asked me.

I nodded.

He smiled and turned the music off but the music in my head was just as loud as what had been playing.

"Go to the fifth floor and jump off the roof, but don't jump until you see my tail lights past the gates," he said as he packed his things. He got to the door. "Goodbye Cammie," he smiled.

"Goodbye Dr. Steve," I smiled and we both walked out. He went to his car and I went to the fifth floor.

I was finally going to get rid of the music.

The thought of that made me smile as I walked up the stairs.

I walked passed Zach, Grant and Jonas's room.

Passed Joe's room.

Passed Mom's office.

Passed the girls' rooms.

Passed my room with my sleeping roommates.

I walked to Madam Dabney's room, just like my dream.

I walked to the window and opened it before stepping onto the icy roof. It was cold out but I didn't feel a thing.

I watched as Dr. Steve's tail lights reached the gates.

I smiled.

I took a step closer.

The lights started down highway 10.

I hummed to the music and swayed for a bit.

I reached the edge and smiled up to the dark starry sky.

"See you soon, Daddy," I whispered and closed my eyes.

I smiled.

I turned and spread my arms wide before I fell backwards.

"CAMMIE!" multiple voices yelled.

It was too late.

I was falling.

I was humming.

I was happy.

I was gonna see my daddy.

For real this time.

I felt the wind rush around me.

My hair whip around as I fell.

I smiled the whole way down.

I felt my bones crack and snap, my blood gush from my head, the air in my lungs leave, and my body crumble as I hit the ground.

I heard blood curdling screams.

I smiled.

"The music is gone," I whispered to nobody.

Then _nothing_.


	8. Chapter 8

**ZPOV**

_Cammie fell. Cammie fell. Cammie fell._

That was the only thought running through my head as I ran down the stairs and to the ground floor and out the door until I was outside. I ran and I got around the corner just in time to see Cammie hit the ground.

She smiled.

"The music is gone," she whispered then her smile faded as her head sagged. I could hear the girls screaming, but couldn't take me eyes off of Cammie. Her eyes were still open but they were unfocused and she stopped breathing. I couldn't move. I heard other footsteps as everyone ran down the stairs and around the corner to see Cammie.

Unlike me, they could move and they ran to check on Cammie. I was paralyzed. I looked at the love of my life as she lay on the ground, dead, all because of my mother. Joe and Grant picked her limp body up and I fell to my knees.

Tears filled my eyes and I crumbled to the ground, crying. I felt a gentle hand on my back and turned to see Liz, Macey and Bex all with tears in their eyes.

"They're taking her to the hospital wing. She has a _very_ faint heart beat," Liz said. I nodded and got up. We all walked to the hospital wing and went to Cammie's room. She wasn't in there. I looked at Joe; he had tears streaming down his face.

"She's having emergency surgery and blood transfusion," he said. I looked around the room and saw her mom wasn't there, she must be giving blood. I nodded and sat on the floor. I leaned against the wall with my knees to my chest. My arms were wrapped around my knees and I was crying into my knees.

I felt eyes on me but I didn't care. My life is fucked up and the one somewhat normal person in it just attempted suicide and might die, so I was gonna cry my eyes out and not give a shit who saw.

The door opened and closed. I heard high heels click until a chair scratched the floor slightly as someone sat in it. Her mom.

I continued to sob from my place on the floor for the next three hours until I was too dehydrated to cry anymore. I just sat there, my head resting on my knees for another 5 hours. I looked up and saw everyone had fallen asleep and that Mrs. Morgan and Joe had left the room. School had started.

I guess I fell asleep.

The door opened but no one woke up as a bed was pushed into the room. I got up and saw a white sheet over Cammie. I looked at the doctor as I felt my heart burn to ashes.

"She's alive, just barely, but alive nonetheless. She needs to keep warm so we covered her with the sheets, don't worry," Dr. Wolf informed me. I felt the smallest smile tug at my lips. She's alive!

I turned to Cammie and kissed her forehead through the sheets. The nurses started to stick needles in her and hook her up to multiple machines. They started wrapping her up in casts and regular wrap.

"I'll go tell her mom and Mr. Solomon," I told them and walked out.

I went into the Dining Hall where everyone should be finishing up breakfast and walked up to the teachers table. Joe and Mrs. Morgan looked up at me with sad eyes.

"She's alive but only slightly," with those words they literally ran out of the room and to the hospital wing, getting lots of attention as they did so. I followed at a slightly slower pace, but only a little, they run fast.

We got to the room and saw Cammie no longer had the sheet over her and had a back brace on, both her arms and legs were in casts, her head was wrapped and she had a neck brace. There was a note sitting on her chest, it was pink.

Joe picked it up and handed it to me. I looked at it; on the front it said 'Zachary'. I turned it over and read it out loud.

_Oh poo, Cameron didn't die. Don't fret she will soon enough. I saw you crying Zachary, you are very poor at hiding your emotions; might want to work on that. ~Love, Mom._

"Crazy bitch," I muttered. "How did she even get out?" I asked Joe and Mrs. Morgan.

"We don't know," Joe said after a moment. Cammie started to stir. Her heart beat slowed down even as she woke up. We rushed around her. She looked at her mom.

"Mom, I love you, I love you so much and I'm sorry you're losing me like you lost Dad," she turned to Joe. "Joe, you're the best spy I know and were the closest thing to a father figure I had, I love you. Take good care of Mom, she'll need you. Zach…" she took a deep breath and tears filled her eyes as she looked to me. "Zach, I love you…" she took another deep breath and closed her eyes. "But save your heart for someone that's worth dying for," she whispered and the heart monitor slowed more.

"I love you too Gallagher girl, but you'll be ok, you'll get through this. Don't leave me, please don't leave me," I whispered back and took her hand into mine as tears streamed down my face. "Don't leave me, please, please don't leave me, I love you please don't go. I need you, please," a single tear fell and she let out her last breath before the heart monitor let out a steady 'beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep' noise.

I fell to my knees and cried. I kissed her hand and begged for her to wake up. By now everyone had woken up. The nurses rushed in and took all the metal off of her before they started to shock her. I had to be dragged out of the room because I couldn't leave Cammie. I was screaming, crying, fighting, anything to get back to Cammie.

"Zach. Stop. She's gone," Her mom told me. I saw the tears in her eyes. I calmed a bit but the tears came back and I pulled her into a hug as we both cried.

"How cute," a voice behind us cooed.

**A/N I couldn't stop crying while writing this, sorry it's short but I promise it's nowhere close to being over. REVIEW!**


	9. Chapter 9

_I opened my eyes and saw an insanely bright light, but it was beautiful and welcoming. I saw it was like a tunnel and my dad was at the end of it. He was smiling at me._

"_Come on Cammie," he was wearing white and looked happy, like nothing bad had ever happened to him. He was waving me over and I couldn't fight the smile that made its way to my face as I ran over to Dad. But I stopped short, which made him frown in confusion. "What are you waiting for Cammie?" he asked me._

"_I can't leave Mom, she needs me," I told him. He smiled sadly at me._

"_She will be fine, you'll be away from harm," he told me but I shook my head._

"_She'll be devastated if she loses me like she lost you," I said. "She already cries over you, I don't want her to cry over me too," I said as tears stung my eyes. He had tears in his too._

"_Alright, but come here Cammie," he said and held his arms wide. I smiled and walked over to him. He hugged me and kissed my forehead._

"_I missed you Daddy," I whispered as the tears streamed down my face. He hugged me tighter._

"_I missed you too. Tell your mom I love her and that she should move on, alright sweetie?" he asked as he pulled back. I nodded and smiled up at him. I got on my tip-toes and kissed his cheek before I started to walk back. "I love you Cammie!" he called after me. I turned to face him._

"_I love you Daddy!" I called back and continued to walk back down the tunnel._

-Meanwhile- **ZPOV**

We all turned to see Catherine, standing there, smiling.

"Told you see would die soon," she smiled evilly.

I stepped away from Mrs. Morgan and stepped towards my _mother_.

"What the fuck is wrong with you, you psycho bitch?!" I shouted at her and, surprisingly, she flinched.

"You will not speak to your mother that way, young man," she glared.

"Some mother you are," I snorted.

"I'm the only one you have," she retorted.

"I've done perfectly fine without you and would be so much better off if you had stayed away," I seethed. She put on a hurt face and brought her hand to her chest, where her heart _should_ be.

"You don't mean that, do you?" she sobbed, and then smiled evilly. "I just came by to tell you why we had Cameron kill herself, even though obviously she's too stupid to do even _that_ right, it's because her father knew the names of the Circle leader but because he wouldn't tell us, and Cameron knew them as well all we just had to do was get her to tell us…and she did. We got what we wanted and no longer need her, so now that you know. I'll be on my way," she smiled and walked out.

Joe and I looked at each other before we ran after her. She hopped out of a window and landed on top of a van, got down, climbed in and it drove off.

Joe said some very colorful words under his breath in Arabic while I said some in Farsi.

Liz ran into the room with a sad look on her face. A tear fell and I knew what happened.

Cammie died.

We walked back into the room and I took the seat next to Cammie. She was strong to survive even this long after that fall. She's my strong little Gallagher girl.

She _was_ my strong little Gallagher girl.

Now she's gone.

**CPOV**

_I looked at my body in the bed, I looked so broken. I looked at Zach who was bawling as he kissed my hand. He was next to me as I lay there in bed. Dr. Wolf walked in. She opened her mouth to say something but the heart monitor started. It gave a small 'beep' every two seconds._

_Everyone stared at it for a minute, in complete shock. I walked over to Mom and kneeled in front of her from her place in the seat by Joe; he was holding her hand and rubbing his thumb in a soothing motion._

"_Mom?" I asked but she starred at the monitor. "I saw Dad, Mom," I smiled at her even though she couldn't see me. "He says he loves you but you should move on, and between us, I think Joe has a crush on you," I whispered the last part and giggled a little despite the tears in my eyes._

_Doctors and nurses started rushing around and pushing everyone else out of the room._

_I followed them._

"_She's alive," Mom whispered and then broke out in a smile as happy tears ran down her face. "She's alive!" she threw her arms around Joe who also had happy tears running down his face and caught her. "My baby's alive," she sobbed._

_I turned to Bex, Liz and Macey and saw they were hugging each other as the cried their eyes out. I rushed to their side and hugged them but my arms went nowhere._

_I sighed and turned to Grant and Jonas who had tears in their eyes and smiled on their faces, but being trained assassins, they tried to keep their tears in._

_I turned to Zach. He didn't show any emotions._

_I walked over to him, grasped his face with my hands and kissed him. His eyes got wider but he didn't kiss back or hold me in his arms, much to my disappointment._

_I pulled back, my lips still slightly touching his, and whispered._

"_I love you Zach."_

"_Cammie," he whispered as his eyes got glassy._

_Dr. Wolf walked out._

"_Cameron is alive, it was a close call for a moment but she is alive and is in a coma," Everyone smile at that but frowned when Dr. Wolf didn't smile back. "But, sadly, we know she will never come out of it and will only survive off of life support," she said then turned to Mom. "Do you want to pull the plug?"_

"_No! Mom, don't do it, she's wrong! I'll come out of it, I know I will! You know I will! Don't pull the plug, please Mom, don't!" I shouted at her as she stared at my body through the doorway._

_Tears filled her eyes. She opened her mouth but a strangled noise came out. Tears poured down her face but she just stared at my body with her mouth slightly opened. She looked at everyone, each of them, in the eyes before she turned to Dr. Wolf._

"_Are you sure she will _never_ come out of it?" she asked. Dr. Wolf looked down but then looked back down._

"_She has a 2.764578% chance but the odds could go up or down in due time," she said._

"_I can make it Mom! Don't pull the plug!" I shouted at her franticly._

"_Please don't Mrs. Morgan, she has a chance," Zach pleaded._

"_Listen to him Mom!" I said, pointing at Zach._

"_But it isn't much Zach, I don't want us to get our hopes up," Mom said as the tears continued to stream down her face._

"_No, get your hopes up; I'll come out of it! Mom, please, I'm begging you. Listen to me, _I'll make it_!" I shouted and I saw something pass over her face for a moment before she closed her eyes._

"_No, I don't want to pull the plug, not yet. I'm going to give my baby a chance," she said, her eyes still closed. I kissed her cheek and rushed into the room to look at myself._

"_How am I going to wake you up?" I whispered thoughtfully as the nurses left the room and everyone else came back in. I grabbed my hand to lift it. Nothing happened. I placed my hand over my hand and pushed my fingers inward. It worked, they moved._

_I smiled._

_Nobody noticed._

_I lay down on top of myself…I'll never get use to saying that…and moved my foot._

"_Eep," I yelped as I slipped back into my body. All I could see was darkness. I sat up and saw my lower half was still in my body. I wiggled my foot and felt pain. "Shit!" I shouted as I felt the pain intensify._

_Everyone saw my foot twitch and starred at it._

_Despite the pain it brought, I twitched it again._

"_Do you think she can hear us?" Macey asked._

"_Joe did you hear us when we were talking to you?" Mom asked._

"_I heard mumbling but not much other than that," he shrugged. "But it's different for everybody," he said._

"_Cammie, if you can hear us groan or do something to show us you can," Liz said and I twitched my foot again, only to yelp in pain again._

_They all perked up when they saw my foot twitch._

_I laid back into my body and twitched my fingers._

_I brought my head out and saw Zach take my hand in his before taking a seat by my bed, making me smile._

"_I think the doctor was wrong, with these responses Cammie should have a higher chance of surviving," Liz said and Jonas nodded before they started having nerd talk with each other._

_I got out of my body and walked over to Mom, I whispered in her ear, hoping that would work._

"_Thanks for giving me a chance," I said and saw her gasp._

"_What is it Rachel?" Joe asked. Mom looked at him wide eyed for a moment before she shook her head._

"_Nothing, I thought I heard something but I think it was just my mind playing tricks on me," she said dismissively but Joe wasn't buying it, by now everyone else was looking at her too._

"_What do you 'think' you heard?" Bex asked._

"_I thought I heard Cammie whisper 'Thanks for giving me a chance'. But that's crazy," she said and brushed it off._

_Zach's eyes widened a bit but he didn't comment._

"_What is it Zach?" Macey whispered to him. He looked at her before he grabbed her wrist and pulled her out of the room._

_I followed._

_They walked a bit with Macey complaining for him to slow down._

_He walked into a secret passageway before they stopped._

"_I thought I heard Cammie say something to me too, in the hallway, after her heart started beating again," he said quickly._

"_What did she say?" Macey asked, pulling her wrist away from Zach, rubbing it._

"'_I love you Zach'," he said. She rolled her eyes._

"_Are you sure you didn't just imagine you heard it?" she scoffed._

_I walked up to her and whispered in her ear._

"_He's not lying," I said in a sing song voice. She jumped and yelped._

"_What?!" Zach asked._

"_Um, nothing, but…I believe you now," she said. He eyed her before he smirked._

"_You heard her too, didn't you?" he asked. She rolled her eyes and pouted._

"_Whatever, let's just go back already," she sighed. He chuckled before he started out._

"_So what did she say?" he asked as they walked back. I was holding his hand as they walked but he didn't notice, sadly._

"'_He's not lying'," she said and Zach turned to her._

"_Whoa, do you think she's like…here with us?" he asked. I leaned to his ear._

"_I am here, right next to you," I whispered and kissed his cheek softly. He quickly brought his hand to his cheek and gasped very quietly._

"_No, we're probably just going crazy," Macey said._

"_Yeah, that's got to be it," he said and shook his head._

"_Fine, don't believe me, I'm going to be in my room now, love you," I whispered to him and kissed his cheek softly again before I closed my eyes and opened them again._

_I was in the room. No one was in there. It made me kind of sad but then I remembered we have school. I looked at my body._

"_Let's try and open our eyes," I say and lay on top of me again before I fell into my body. I tried to pry my eyes open but that didn't work. Then I remembered small and soft movements work better so I tried fluttering my eyes._

_I tried and failed._

_I tried again._

_And failed again._

_I tried one more time._

_And failed for the last time._

_I tried to move my eyes around behind my eyelid._

_It hurts and made me tired but it worked._

_I leaned up and looked down at myself._

"_Progress," I muttered._

_Zach and Macey walked in. I got up and ran over to Zach and whispered in his ear._

"_I missed you," I said and saw his eyes widened. I walked over to Macey._

"_Hey Mace, you should go eat, diet or not, you're looking as skinny as little Lizzie," I said and saw her eyes widen too._

_Zach and Macey looked at each other for a moment. I leaned back over to Macey._

"_Don't tell anyone, this is between me, you and Zach," I said. Her eyes got wider. "Hold on," I walked over to Zach._

"_Tell Macey my words exactly. Cammie said don't tell anyone this is between me, you and Macey," I said and stepped away as his eyes widened more._

"'_Cammie said don't tell anyone this is between me, you and Macey'," he quoted and I smiled._

"_She said the same thing to me!" Macey shouted. I rushed to her._

"_Shhh!" I scolded in her ear, and then remembered they can only hear when I'm speaking softly. "Shhh," I said. "Go eat, for real, you need some food, and wash your hair. It's looking a bit greasy from sleeping and lack of showers," I commented softly and saw her eyes widen and she rushed out of the room with a quick bye over her shoulder._

_I went to Zach._

"_She just went to eat," I said. "Go sit by me and hold my hand, I miss your touch," I whispered and he timidly sat in the seat by my bed before taking my hand. I place my hand over my hand and it fell in._

_I twitched my fingers in efforts to move them and he smiled at that._

"_I love it when you smile," I whispered and softly kissed his cheek._

"_Try and wake up Cam, I need you back Gallagher girl," he said and kissed my hand._

"_I'm trying, it's harder than it looks," I said as I got back into my body. I twitched both my feet only to moan in response._

_I got a noise!_

_I tried to open my mouth and form words but that didn't work out all that well._

_I tried fluttering my eyes again._

_They fluttered!_

_I'm waking up!_

_I franticly tried moving every part of my body, ignoring the pain and the fact I look like I'm having a spasm. I just want to wake up._

_In my attempt to wake up, I managed to move my mouth._

"Zach," I croaked out. He perked up.

"Hold on Cam, I got to get your mom and Joe and everyone," he said and kissed my forehead before rushing out of the room.

I started to feel tired and went back to sleep.

_I leaned up._

"_NO! Dammit I was so close!" I shouted._

_Everyone ran into the room, they looked so happy but here I am; back asleep in that damn coma._

_I lean back down and tried again._

_My eyes fluttered but didn't open._

_I tried talking again._

_I twitched my fingers._

"Zach-" I croaked out again before a strangled noise came out, one that was none-too-flattering. I felt someone grasp my hand and heard happy noises and crying. I couldn't stay awake and slipped back into the coma.

_I walked to Zach and whispered to him._

"_I can't stay awake for long periods of time but I'm starting to wake up," I kissed his cheek. He let out a sad sigh and kissed my hand._

"_I know Cammie. I love you," he whispered to my hand before he kissed it again._

"_I love you too," I whispered to him._

**A/N not much of a cliffy but I thought it was better than just killing her off. REVIEW!**


	10. Chapter 10

I spent the next week trying to wake myself up. I knew I was a heavy sleeper but DAMN! I can't even wake myself up!

But I made progress. I can stay awake for a full 25 seconds. I know it sounds short but at first it was only 5 seconds.

Zach would come by every chance he got and talk to me, encouraging me to wake up. Macey would come with him sometimes. Everyone else just came by at night to talk to my body a little, not really me.

I longed to wake up.

I was currently lying in my body trying to open my eyes. Macey was watching me from the right side of my bed while Zach was watching from the left.

My eyes would flutter but nothing more.

_I sat up. I whispered to Zach, "It's not working," I did the same to Macey. Zach took my hand._

"_You'll get it Gallagher girl," he smirked sweetly._

"_Yeah Cam, you just gotta keep trying," Macey smiled. I smiled at their enthusiasm I laid back down._

I tried with all my power to open my eyes, I was straining and my heartbeat started to pick up from the effort. But, in my efforts, my eyes opened.

I smiled weakly because I got them open. But then a wave of fatigue washed over me and I fell asleep.

_I sat up again. I looked at Zach and Macey who were smiling wildly._

"_I fell back asleep," I whispered to both of them._

_They frowned a little but smiled again._

"_You still did it Cam," Macey smiled._

"_Did what?" Mom asked as she, Joe, Bex, Grant, Jonas and Liz walked in. Zach smiled widely._

"_She opened her eyes!" He said loudly._

"_Only for 3 seconds but she did it," Macey clarified and Zach shot her a look before smiling like an idiot again._

_It was so cute to see him act like a child that I laughed. Their eyes widened as they looked at my body._

"_She opened her eyes?!" Bex asked franticly. I nodded then remembered that they couldn't actually see me._

"_Yeah, I'm so proud of my Gallagher girl," Zach smiled at me and took my hand again. I laid back into my body._

I gave Zach a soft squeeze back. No one but he and Macey noticed because they were the only ones who knew I could move a bit more and the strain I've been putting on myself to do so. I tried opening my eyes again but they only fluttered.

I strained, my heartbeat rose, and opened them. I blinked and realized my eyes weren't closing again. I let out a weak laugh and smiled.

I was awake!

Finally!

"Cammie!" Liz shouted and pulled me into a bone crushing hug, and considering a decent amount of my bones _are _crushed, it only brought excruciating pain.

I hissed in pain and she quickly pulled away.

"Oopsie daisy," she smiled sheepishly and I smiled softly at her.

"It's alright Lizzie," I croaked out.

Ugh, my voice sounded better as that ghost thing I was.

Macey grabbed a glass of water and Zach helped me sit up ever-so-carefully.

I slowly sipped the water until the glass was empty and smiled at them before I was lying back down.

"Cam, you've been in a coma for almost 2 weeks," Mom informed me.

"I know," I muttered. There was a silence for a bit.

"How do you know?" Joe asked.

"I saw Dad," I said, completely ignoring the question.

"What?" Mom whispered and was by my side in a second along with Joe.

"He was in heaven," I said. "He wanted me to go with him, I almost did," I said, recalling the memory.

"Not that I'm not happy you didn't go, but…why didn't you?" Grant asked.

"I wasn't ready," I whispered. "He was so happy Mom, you should have seen him. He was laughing and smiling," I took a shaky breath as happy and longing tears filled my eyes. "He loves you, but," I paused as I looked at her. "He said you should move on," I finished and shifted my eyes to Joe.

They both had tears in their eyes as they glanced at each other. They turned back at me and I winked at them before smirking as they blushed.

"Oh, and I'm sorry…about…everything I did," I said and looked into all of their eyes.

"Cammie, it's ok," Jonas said.

"No, it's not," I sighed.

"Catherine was controlling you, you aren't being held accountable for your actions," Bex told me sternly.

"B-but, I told the names…o-of the Circle leaders," I said shakily. Zach was rubbing my arm and holding my hand to try and calm me and it was slowly working.

"We know, Catherine broke out of the CIA, broke into Gallagher and told us before she got away through a window," Joe told me.

"Did you get Dr. Steve?" I asked out of curiosity.

"No, why?" Mom asked.

"He…I don't know how but, he was the one that got talked me into jumping," I said. All their expressions darkened.

"Grant, Bex and Macey, go see if he's still in his off-" I cut Joe off.

"He left," I said.

"How do you know?" Liz asked.

"He walked out behind me, he said bye and went to his car. He told me to wait until his tail lights were past the gates then…jump," I said. I looked at Zach. "I'm sorry you saw that," I told him and saw as his face turned confused.

"Saw what," he asked.

"Me hit the ground," I said as tears filled my eyes. Tears filled his eyes while everyone else turned to him.

"Y-you saw her hit the ground?" Grant asked him. He nodded.

"Oh my God, Zach," Macey said as tears filled her eyes. Everyone looked at her like she was crazy. They didn't know that her and Zach had grown closer during the whole 'Cammie is half-dead and half-alive' thing.

"I thought you two hated each other," Liz said.

"They have a brother-sister relationship now," I said. I closed my eyes to rest. I felt Zach's lips on my forehead before I was out.

_I sat up._

"_NOOOO!" I shouted._

_I, Cameron Ann Morgan, had slipped back into a coma._


	11. Chapter 11

_I kept lying back in my body but nothing happened._

_I was getting frantic._

_I whispered to Zach, "I can't wake up," he didn't do anything. They all just looked at my body._

"_What happened?" Liz asked._

"_Cammie?" Grant asked. I started to tear up._

"_Can she sleep without slipping back into a coma?" Mom asked Dr. Wolf who had just walked into the room._

"_Yes, but she may have considering her condition. Her mind might be putting her body to rest so it could heal better," she said._

"_How long until she wakes up?" Zach asked._

"_We didn't think she would wake up at all, so there is no telling how long," she sighed before walking back out. Everyone but Macey and Zach walked out. "Gallagher girl, twitch your right foot," Zach said and I tried but my foot wouldn't move._

_I cried as I franticly tried to move my foot but it wouldn't budge._

"_I was so close," I whispered into my hands as tears fell from my eyes._

"_Cam, can you move at all?" Macey asked. I leaned over to her._

"_No," I whispered but she didn't hear me._

"_Cam?" she asked._

"_Gallagher girl?" Zach asked. After they didn't get a reply they sighed and walked to the door._

"_She's probably just asleep," Macey told him and he weakly nodded._

_I sat halfway in my body and cried._

_And cried._

_And cried._

_-2 and a half months later-_

_I was lying in my body._

_Nothing had happened._

_People came by but I didn't wake up._

_Couldn't wake up._

_I let out a long sigh-_

"Ugh," I groan when I got a migraine.

"Cammie?!" someone shouted. I felt lighter, and I know there wasn't something around my neck anymore and I arms and legs didn't feel like they had big heavy casts on them. I don't even think I had something around my torso anymore.

I wouldn't know. I had been lying in my body, sleeping the whole time, hoping something would happen.

"Cameron, are you awake?" an authorial figured voice asked.

"Yes," I said and heard my scratchy voice. I felt some sit me up and a cool glass being press to my lips but I couldn't move, every movement I made hurt.

"You need to drink something Cam," Macey tried with a weak laugh. I felt the glass against my lips shake when she laughed so I few she was holding it. I could only groan again.

"Get her some tubes," I heard someone say and feet rushing around before I felt myself being lied back down and my mouth being forced open as a tube was slid down my throat.

"Relax," an easy voice said. I couldn't move so I didn't really protest. "Don't talk with the tube in your mouth ok?" the voice asked but it was getting fuzzy and fading as I slowly fell back asleep.

-Page Break-

I woke up and my headache was gone but I still felt the tube in my throat **(for those of you that have had a tube in your throat before, I think we can all agree that it's very uncomfortable at first)** and it still hurt to move.

I groaned.

"Oh, good, you're awake. I'm going to remove you're tube so try to relax," I think it was Dr. Wolf that said it. I relaxed as I felt the tubes slip from my slightly dry throat. "You can talk now Cameron," she said.

"Cammie?" little Lizzie asked.

"Yeah?" I asked her.

"Cammie!" she shouted and I felt myself being hugged. The pain started to subside so I didn't care much but I couldn't move enough to hug her back or open my eyes.

"Gallagher girl, can you move?" Zach asked.

"I don't know, I'm too tired to find out," I said.

"Kiddo, can you at least open your eyes?" Mom asked. I saw the orangey color behind my eyelids and knew it was a bad idea but I pried my eyes open anyways only to quickly close them back because of the blinding lights of the room. I heard a flick and the dark behind my eyes got darker and I slowly opened my eyes again.

I was seeing double so I blinked a couple of times to readjust my vision.

"How do you feel?" Joe asked.

"Tired," I said.

And I was.

I was tired of being in the hospital.

I was tired of running from Catherine only for her to get me again.

I was tired of the people I love getting hurt.

I was just…tired of it all.

"Well this time you only slept for 4 hours 39 minutes and 12 seconds," Liz said, making me smile a little.

"What day is it?" I asked.

"December 21," Bex said and that made my eyes go wide.

"What are you still doing here? You should be with your families," I protested.

"Cam, you're our sister, we would rather make sure you make it out of a coma," Macey said.

"I still think you should be spending Christmas with your families," I mumbled.

"But Cammie you are our family. We're sisters, and we never leave a sister behind," Liz said, sounding like she didn't want an argument. I smiled a little more.

"Thanks you guys," I said. They all hugged me. "So…when can I leave?" I asked.

"Now if you want, but you might want to sit in a wheel chair until you regain your strength," a nurse said. I didn't know she was in here, oh well; spies are good at going unnoticed.

"Alright," I said and started to carefully lean up (with Zach's help), and slowly get out of the bed. Joe got the wheel chair and I sat in it. "Guys, you should go spend Christmas with your families, I'm fine and am with my family," I said gesturing to Joe, Mom and Zach, much to his surprise.

"Right, I'll go call my parents to get me," Bex sighed and hugged me one last time before walking towards the door.

"Yeah, I need to tell my mom and dad I'm coming home too," Liz said and hugged me before following after Bex.

"Yeah, I guess my parents should know I'll be home," Macey shrugged and hugged me. "Bye Cam, happy holidays!" she called back as she left.

"I better get them some limos," Mom said as she and Joe walked out…HOLDING HANDS!

"I knew they were a couple," I giggled.

"Gallagher girl, you had me so worried," Zach said as he kneeled in front of me.

"Yeah, I'm sorry, when I slipped back into the coma I couldn't talk to you anymore," I said.

"So you really were talking and me and McHenry weren't just going crazy?" he asked with a smirk, making me laugh a little.

"Yeah," I said and ran my hand through his hair. "Your hair is soft," I said and he smirked.

I rolled my eyes.

He leaned up and kissed me.

I kissed back then became very aware I needed a shower and to brush my teeth.

I pulled back and he pouted.

It was cute.

"I need to go shower and brush my teeth," I said.

"Then you need to eat, you don't weigh much Gallagher girl," Zach said. His lips were in a tight straight line.

I nodded and he smiled before kissing my forehead and wheeling me to my room. The girls' things were already gone so I guess they left.

I got out of the chair and carefully walked to the closet to get some clothes. I grabbed a tight white tank top and grey sweat pants that had a pull string so I could tighten it if necessary. Zach walks to my bed and lies down while I go to take a shower.

I stripped of my clothes and got into the shower.

I let the hot water soothe my aching muscles.

I shaved.

I washed my hair.

I washed my body (carefully).

I washed my face.

I got out.

I dried off.

I looked at the foggy mirror and saw the words that were drawn in.

'See you soon Cameron

-COC'

I had a mini heart attack.

I changed.

I wiped the note away.

I brushed my teeth.

I walked out.

Zach was asleep.

I smiled and got in next to him.

He pulled me closer and kissed the top of my head, making me question if he was really asleep.

"Zach?" I whispered.

He didn't reply.

I kissed his chest and went to sleep with one last thought.

'_Why is the COC still after me?_'

**A/N tell me why you think the COC is still after her! I also want to hear anything else you have to say about the story! SPOILER! *in a few chapters it will get VERY intense***

**R&R**

**~ Gracie **


	12. Chapter 12

When I woke up I saw that I was sitting in a chair.

I was strapped to it.

"This can't be happening," I whispered and my head fell forward, my hair curtaining around my face.

I lifted my head and started to look around the room. There was a simple wooden door with a rusted knob in front of me, the floor was tiled but stained with blood, the walls were a sickening yellow but I think they use to be white and they also had bloody hand print smudged on them. I was in the clothes I wore…last time I was awake. There were three cameras from what I could see.

All hooked to the ceiling, one on my left, one on my right and one over the door. They were all on.

I wasn't gagged and I wasn't blindfolded (obviously) but I was alone.

I was beginning to wonder if anyone was going to come when I realized: I didn't want anyone to come.

I want to be alone.

But that didn't much matter because they would come sooner or later.

I sat perfectly still and watched the door with an emotionless mask on my face.

-Page Break-

I had sat here for I think it was 4 days 6 hours and 54 minutes without talking, food or water. I was starting to crack.

I think that was there plan.

The door knob opened and I covered my emotions. That is, until I saw who it was: Bex, Liz, Macey, Grant, Jonas, Zach, Mom and Joe.

"Oh my God, thank God you guys are here! We need to-" Bex slapped me. I looked at them in shock as they all smirked at me evilly.

Even Liz and Jonas!

Joe took out a knife and started towards me. He sliced my right cheek.

"What the hell?!" I shouted as I started to squirm in my chair.

Then Grant kicked my leg. I bit my tongue to stop from shouting.

Instead, I whimper.

Liz walked up and punched me in the gut.

Macey punched me and I felt the bruise already forming on my cut cheek.

Mom took the knife from Joe and started cutting my arms.

Blood bubbled out.

I had tears fill my eyes but I refused to let them fall.

Jonas did the same as Liz but with more force and I whimpered again. They all walked out except Zach.

He had his hands in his pockets and he was smirking evilly.

It was only us and the more he smirked the more I had trouble fighting the tears.

He stepped forward and I, more than anything, wanted to be away from him.

"Get away from me," I told him and he only smirked more. He unstrapped me and pulled out a knife.

He started cutting my clothes.

"What the fuck, Zach?! Get the hell away!" I shouted and started backing up into a corner. He had me down to my underwear and bra before I was pressed against the wall and he was right up against me, chest to chest. He started kissing me hungrily and I almost kissed back until I remembered the situation.

Plus his lips didn't feel right.

He started touching me and I couldn't hold back my tears anymore.

I was broken.

Oh so broken.

I didn't fight when he took off the rest of my clothes.

I didn't fight when he started kissing my breasts.

I didn't fight when he started to undress himself.

I didn't fight when he wrapped me around him.

I didn't fight when he pressed my back to the wall.

I didn't fight when he started ramming into me.

I didn't fight when he laughed as I cried.

I didn't fight when he started to kiss me again.

I didn't fight.

I gave in.

I gave up.

"Why aren't you enjoying yourself?" he asked harshly and I started crying harder.

I had my arms around his neck and I was sobbing on his shoulder as he pounded into me.

I was sure to have a few bruises on my back from this tomorrow.

We both came.

He pulled out and dropped me to the floor. He started to redress himself.

The door opened and Mom walked in.

"Get dressed you filthy slut," she hissed at me as she threw some sweat pants and a black tank top at me. They both walked out and Joe walked in. I started to get dressed but I was tired and weak from lack of food and water.

Joe was watching me closely and his eyes…oh God…his eyes were dark with lust.

"Please stop," I whispered and he stripped me again along with himself. "I'm your best friend's only daughter, you're raping me, do you not see how wrong this is?" he didn't stop.

He kissed me and wrapped me around him.

I was too tired to fight even if I wanted to.

He slammed his already erect cock into my cum filled pussy.

He pinned my upper arms to the wall so I had to wrap my leg tighter around him as he slammed his huge dick into me.

I cried.

He was panting heavy in my ear and on my neck and I was sobbing.

I was so broken.

He was going longer then Zach and I was so tired already, I was fighting back all the moans I had in me.

The friction was amazing but it was with my _Godfather_!

I felt so disgusting.

I wanted to crawl in a hole and die.

We came.

He did like Zach and dropped me to the ground after pulling out.

Now my back and ass are going to have bruises.

He got dressed and walked out as Jonas and Grant walked in.

"Don't bother getting dressed," Jonas said and I started sobbing harder.

"At least she's willing, unlike Bex," Grant told Jonas.

"Yeah, same with Liz," he smirked. They undressed and got on either side of me.

"Get on your hands and knees," Grant ordered and pulled out a knife.

I didn't move.

Knifes don't hand much effect on me anymore.

Jonas grabbed my hair and pulled me onto my hands and knees. They got on theirs and Jonas put his cock to my lips while Grant slid into my sore pussy. Grant gave Jonas the knife and he started to slowly cut my shoulder.

I opened my mouth and he went in.

Jonas had his hands tangled in my hair as he went in and Grant had a steal grip on my ass as he slide out.

They had a rhythm.

Grant went in, Jonas went out.

Jonas went in, Grant went out.

I was silently crying while they did this. I was also aware that Mom walked in with a disgusted and disapproving scowl on her face as she stood in the corner and watched.

We all came.

They slid out and I spat Jonas cum out of my mouth. I started to quickly dress as they walked out, scared someone else might walk in and decide to use me for their pleasure.

Bex, Liz and Macey walked in after I was dressed, Mom just watched. Bex slapped me then Liz slapped me.

"You whore!" Bex shouted.

"You slept with our men!" Liz screamed.

"You also fucked your Mom's boyfriend aka your Godfather, slut," Macey said.

"You already have Zach!" Bex shouted and was about to hit me again when Mom spoke up.

"Girls, stop," she said and pushed off the wall. She walked up in front of me and Bex, Liz and Macey were standing behind her with scowls on the faces.

She stared at me while the tears streamed down my sore cheeks.

My sex hurt and it was hard to stand.

"You are pathetic," she said. "You are worthless and didn't do anything to stop them," her voice was emotionless. "Your father would be disappointed," she said coldly and she grabbed my hair and started to drag me to the chair. I was sat back down and strapped.

They all walked to the door when Mom turned back to me. "And frankly, I don't want a daughter like _you_," she said with hatred as she walked out.

I sat in the chair and cried.

-Page Break-

Catherine walked in with a glass of water and a bread roll.

"You look terrible," she said with mock sympathy.

I glared at her.

"Here," she sat the glass down and tied my feet together before unstrapped me.

I was so weak.

She handed me the water and roll before leaning back on the wall and watching.

I ate the roll and drank the water. She took the glass from me before strapping me back to the chair. She smashed the glass on the wall and took the biggest piece.

She walked to the door and Zach walked in smirking. She handed him the glass shard and walked out.

I glared at him as he walked up to me.

"Something wrong, Gallagher girl?" he smirked and cocked his head to the side.

"I hate you," I told him coldly.

He didn't respond he just started randomly cutting me.

I was losing blood fast, I was sure I would bleed out. He stopped and stared at me with lust filled eyes.

He kissed me.

It felt so wrong.

He walked out and Catherine walked in.

"Why am I here?" I asked.

"Because you're just so much fun to torture," she smiled.

"Fuck off," I said.

"Your attitude is getting on my nerves," she snapped.

"Your voice is getting on mine!" I shot back.

She slapped me.

"Don't talk lip to me," she seethed.

"Don't talk to me at all," I said and leaned my head back with my eyes closed.

"Fine then, see you in a week," she sang and walked to the door.

"See you then," I sang back to piss her off.

"Bitch," she said.

"Cunt!" I said back before the door slammed shut.

-Page Break-

It's been three days and I was still bleeding slightly but most of it stopped.

The door opened and I looked to see who it was.

It was Joe, Zach, Bex, Macey, Jonas, Mom, Grant and Liz.

I paled.

Zach and Joe quickly unstrapped me and I started backing away from them all before they finished. I accidently tipped the chair back once they were done and started scooting away. My back hit the wall and Zach rushed to me.

"Get the fuck away!" I shouted. Joe pulled out a knife and walked over to me. "Stop torturing me and just kill me already!" I pleaded as I started to cry. Everyone stopped moving and watch me with horror in their eyes. I sobbed and started to scoot farther away, into a corner.

"Gallagher gi-"

"Don't call me that!" I shouted as the salty tears cascaded down my face and started stinging the cuts there.

"Kiddo," Mom whispered.

I cried.

"Cammie-" Joe started.

"Just kill me," I whispered to no one in particular as I sobbed.

Joe walked up and…

**A/N CLIFFY! Ok now I know this chapter is VERY smutty and…confusing so let's see who can guess what's going on here!**

**R&R**

**~ Gracie**


	13. Chapter 13

_Joe walked up and…_placed the knife to my neck. He started laughing like a maniac. Everyone backed off while I cried. He picked me up and placed me in front of him before he wrapped and arm around my waist and I started to feel sick.

"Joe, what the hell are you doing?" Mom yelled.

He smirked.

"If you must know, I've been _doing_ your lovely daughter," he said and licked my cheek which made me cry harder.

"What the bloody hell, Solomon?!" Bex screeched.

"She didn't even fight it. Isn't that right Cam?" he asked as he looked at me and I closed my eyes as the tears fell faster. "Isn't that right?" he asked harder and pressed the knife into my neck.

I nodded.

"In fact, if I recall correctly, she wrapped her legs tightly around me as I pounded her. Don't you remember that?" he asked with a smug smirk on his face. I hiccupped and nodded my head.

"Gallagher girl," Zach whispered.

"Don't call me that," I said back.

"Joe, why are you doing this?" Mom asked.

"It isn't like any of you did any better," I mumbled and Joe threw his head back in laughter.

"What are you talking about Cammie?" Liz asked. I glared at them.

All of them.

I didn't respond because Joe had recovered from his laughter and was now smirked and he started slowly to cut my shirt sleeve.

I was wearing a tank top.

This isn't good.

"What happened to her Joe," Zach demanded.

"Well, first we all came in and beat up on her a little, then you raped her, then I did, then Grant and Jonas doubled up on her. I personally thought it was hot. And then Bex, Liz and Macey started slapping her and calling her a slut. And my favorite part was when you, Rachel, told her that her father would be disappointed in her and you never wanted a daughter like her. You practically disowned her," he chuckled at the last part.

I felt him cut though the sleeve.

"We never did those things!" Grant shouted.

"You can wait in here," Some big guy in black shouted and pushed a man in, he was tied up and gagged. It was Joe.

"I'm so confused," Macey said and brought a hand to her head.

Jonas and Mom went to untie him.

I turned to look at the Joe holding me and when I did he started kissing me.

He put the knife to me neck and pressed down.

I felt it cutting my skin.

I cried as I kissed back.

I felt the blood running down my skin.

He forced his tongue into my mouth.

I didn't fight.

I was weak and pathetic and worthless and a disappointment and I couldn't fight off a guy with a knife.

That shouldn't have been a problem, any other day I could have taken him!

But I was so broken and just didn't have it in me to fight anymore.

He pushed me to the ground and ran to the door.

He threw the knife and my head and I pulled back a millisecond early and it missed.

I didn't bother getting up.

I didn't have the energy to do it.

I didn't have any reason to.

My mom disowned me.

My sort of boyfriend raped me.

His friends raped me.

My friends hate me for 'stealing' their boyfriends.

My dad is disappointed in me.

I haven't eaten or drank in three days.

I've been cut and almost bled out twice in those three days.

I have nothing to live for.

I thought back to the knife.

It wasn't far away.

I could end it all.

All of it.

With one swift slice.

It could all be over.

I started feeling around for the knife but couldn't find it.

Then I felt someone cutting my feet bindings.

I still didn't bother looking up.

Really, what was the point?

"Cammie?" Liz asked. Maybe if I play dead they'll leave me here to die.

"Cam, come on, we need to get out of here," Macey urged. I rolled over onto my back.

"Leave me here to die," I said and started feeling for the knife again. Then I remembered someone grabbed it and it was pointless to look for it.

"Cammie, we need to leave, you need medical help," Joe said. I looked at him. He looked like the real Joe…but then again I thought the other one looked real too. Could I really even trust anyone ever again?

Nope.

"Leave. Me. Here. To. Die." I emphasized every word. It was silent for a moment.

"Are you going to scream if I come near you?" Joe asked. I eyed him carefully.

"I might," I said truthfully. He sighed and grabbed his gag from earlier before walking over to me. I didn't scream; I was just too tired to try. He lifted my head and tided the gag around my mouth. Then he picked me up and threw me over his shoulder.

I still didn't fight.

I was dizzy though.

I fought it off as they ran out of…wherever the hell we were.

There was a helicopter waiting for us outside and as soon as I was on I ripped the gag off myself and scooted away from everyone. I pulled my legs to my chest, wrapped my arms around my knees and watched everyone with judging and calculating eyes.

Studying their every movement; waiting for something that could tell me real from fake.

Everyone sat away from me, probably making sure I didn't snap. They all looked worried. I decided I didn't want to look at them so I tore my gaze away and rested my head on my arms.

"Cammie, do you want some water?" Bex asked softly and slowly.

I didn't respond.

"Cam, drink some water," Joe told me in a slightly stronger yet still soft voice.

I didn't respond. I simply lifted my head and held my hand out. Macey handed me a bottle of water quickly then backed up a bit, probably trying to stay out of my comfort zone. I eyed the water.

What if it's bleach?

"It's water," Jonas said. Had I spoken out loud?

I glared at him and carefully brought the liquid to my mouth. I drank it and it was, in fact, water.

I finished the bottle and sat it down next to me before resting my head again.

"Cammie?" I lifted and head. "You can trust us," Grant said.

"Can I?" I asked and rest my head again.

The rest of the ride was silent but when we landed everyone was coming near me. I was too defeated to fight but I still know I had terror in my eyes. Joe picked me up carefully and walked me into the school just as limos started to pull up.

I was so scared.

I didn't know what was real and what wasn't. I couldn't trust anyone. I don't want this life. I hate this life. Do other people go through this stuff too? Or is this special treatment just for me? Why do they want me anyways? Don't they already have the information they need?

Joe walked into the infirmary and I was put on a gurney. I finally let my dizziness take over as they put a mask over my face.

I passed out

-Page Break-

I started to come to but I didn't want to open my eyes, whenever I open my eyes bad things happen. Of course what I want doesn't matter to anyone anymore. I opened my eyes and saw that the people I use to trust were in here watching me.

"Cammie, baby," _Mom_ said.

I turned away from them and closed my eyes again.

"Gallagh-"

"How could you?" I asked turning to them. They seemed a bit taken aback.

"How could we what?" Joe asked.

"You know what you did," I accused. There was a knock at the door before any of them could reply. Mr. Mosckowitz walked in with a tape.

"It's from the Circle," he said and handed it to Joe before quickly walking out. I guess he was worried I would lung at him again. Joe looked at the tape then at me but I was more focused on the tape.

"What's on this tape?" he asked looking at me.

"Nothing you don't already know," I said with venom laced in my words and glared at them before I turned away from them again. I heard a sigh then they all gathered around the TV that was never taken out of the room from the first tape and started watching the video.

I watched it too. There was sound but I couldn't really hear it because I wasn't as close as them and the volume was low. I could tell it was going fast because the first 4 days I was there I was completely alone, strapped to a chair, watching a door but it only last a few minutes rather than days.

"How long were you sitting in that chair like that?" Jonas asked.

"4 days 6hours and 54 minutes," I told them.

Everyone was confused when they saw themselves walk into the room then they all gasped when Bex slapped me. Their eyes went wide when they saw themselves beating on me. They all watched carefully as they saw themselves leave and Zach was the only one left.

I looked away while they watched.

I didn't want to relive the moments to come.

I closed my eyes hoping to go back to sleep.

My wish was granted and I slept somewhat peacefully.

**A/N poor Cammie, she's been through so much. Will she ever trust them again? Is everyone who they say they are? Why is the COC still chasing her? THESE ARE THE QUESTIONS THAT NEED ANSWERED! So go to the box below and tell me your opinion! :)**

**~ Gracie**


	14. Chapter 14

**A/N Long time, no see!...or is it read? Type maybe? Fuck it…I'M BACK! :)**

I woke up and had a major headache. I groaned slightly before actually opening my eyes. The light above my head burned my eyes but I would rather look at it then the people in the room watching me, therefore, I stared at the light. It was silent and I was perfectly content to stare at the light until my eyes turned to ash, but apparently everyone else thought different because the lights were turned off.

"Cammie?" little Lizzie asked me.

"What?" I snapped, not looking away from the ceiling. I heard her yelp slightly and a retreating footstep but I didn't care, I didn't care about anything anymore and the moment I was alone I knew I would be happy again, I had a plan and no matter what I was going to pull through.

"Cameron, that is no way to talk to your friend!" Mom scolded.

"What friend?! I don't have any! I'm nothing but a filthy slut! Remember _Mom_?!" I shouted, still not turning my glare away from the ceiling. No one said anything. "That's what I thought," I mumbled.

"Gallagher girl, you're not a slut," Zach said.

"That is not my name,_ Zachary_," I said slowly.

"Cameron, that wasn't us that…did _that_ to you," Joe said.

"Like I'll believe anything any of _you_ say," I scoffed.

"Fine, don't believe us, but at least hear us out," Bex pleaded.

"No, I don't want to hear anything you have to say. I can't trust you anymore," it was silent after I said my bold words. "I don't trust anyone anymore," I whispered finally.

-Page Break-

**3****rd**** Person POV**

"No, I don't want to hear anything you have to say. I can't trust you anymore," Cammie said with hatred to her words then it was silent. "I don't trust anyone anymore," she whispered. Everyone knew she was hurting but after what she said, they were too.

Catherine had finally gotten to her. She broke her. Cammie could no longer trust and that might just lead to her demise. Sweet, friendly, loving, kind-hearted, selfless Cammie, no longer had faith in anyone. She was a shell of her former self. She no longer cared how others felt, she wasn't friendly or loving, she had her kind heart traded for a stone cold one that cared for no one, and she was not selfless anymore.

Everyone else was silent as they watched Cammie. They weren't sure of what to do now. They could try and talk to her, but she probably wouldn't listen. They could try and comfort her, but she would probably tell them to go away. They just weren't sure what they could do for her anymore without her hating them more.

Slowly, one by one, everyone started to leave until it was only Zach and Cammie left. Cammie had already started to slowly fall asleep and Zach just sat in the chair by her bed and watched her. Once he was sure she had fallen asleep, he took her hand gently into his and kissed it before just holding it.

"I'm sorry Cammie," Zach whispered to Cammie's sleeping form. What he didn't know though, was that Cammie hadn't fallen asleep. She had heard him and was slowly starting to trust again.

Zach's heart hurt. His mother had broken the girl he loved, physically, mentally and emotionally. She hated him for something he didn't even do. Cammie saw who she thought was him when she needed help and he hurt her. So many men have hurt her. Why do they keep hurting her?

Zach felt tears sting his eyes as he sat his head on the bed. He knew he was alone and Cammie was asleep so he felt it was safe to cry and get it out rather than holding it in.

Cammie heard Zach start to cry and she felt her heart hurt a little knowing she was the reason for it. Then she pushed that thought away, replacing it with the thought that he had hurt her and deserved to hurt as well.

"I'm so so sorry Cammie," Zach kept whispering to himself. "I should have been there," he scolded himself, holding her hand a little tighter. "I should have been there for you," he whispered, defeated. He started to kiss her hand again when he saw her looking at him. He quickly wiped his tears and let go of her hand to give her space. He looked away; slightly ashamed he got caught crying and slightly worried she'd yell at him for coming near her.

"Zach?" Cammie asked softly. Zach looked up at her. "Zach, are you ok?" she asked him. He started to wonder if she really was as cold hearted now as he thought, and if she still hated him since she was still worried about him and his feelings even though she had been through so much more.

"I'm fine Cam," he said softly.

"Alright," she said and closed her eyes. Zach watched her and started to wonder if she could trust them again, _anyone_ again. It was worth a shot.

"Cammie, you can trust us, you can trust me," he told her softly. He timidly took her hand into his. She didn't pull her hand away so he took that as a good sigh. Cammie looked at him for a moment.

"Can I really trust you Zach?" she asked him. She wasn't sure why she would ask but she knew she didn't know the answer anymore.

"Yes, Gallagher girl, you can trust me," he said with a small, sweet smirk. She smiled softly then frowned.

"I'm going to trust _you_ and, for now, you only. So don't fuck it up," She told him, completely serious. He smirked.

"Alright, I won't," Zach replied and leaned up to kiss her forehead. Cammie started to fall asleep again; happy she had someone she could trust. Zach leaned over to her ear as she started to sleep and whispered, "I love you Cammie."

Cammie heard him, but was asleep before she could wake herself up and reply.

**A/N I'm sorry it's short, fluffy and a bit of a filler but I felt it need to be done.**


	15. Chapter 15

**A/N I've had this chapter for a while and never updated, I'm sorry. I'm also sorry that I won't be able to update for a while, I'm working strictly on my story **_**Living With Two Worlds**_** until its finish and I don't know how long that could take.**

When I woke up I felt eyes but I also felt a hand holding mine. I didn't want to be touched. I opened my eyes and saw I was still in the hospital bed, Zach was holding my hand while he slept and everyone was in the room, looking at us curiously. I wasn't paying them much mind though, I was recalling yesterday.

How I had lashed out at everyone.

How Zach had stayed.

How Zach had cried.

How he said I could trust him.

How I agreed that I would trust him.

I looked at our hands before closing my eyes again. Then I remembered everyone else was in the room so I pretended to fall asleep by evening out my breaths.

"Zach!" Bex whispered harshly after 10 minutes of pure silence. I was still awake but managed to fool them into thinking I was asleep.

"What?" Zach muttered, still sounding like he was half asleep.

"Wake up and be quiet," Macey whispered.

"I'm awake," he mumbled and started to move around a bit. I felt his thumb rub my hand and my lips twitched a little, fighting the smile wanting to form on them. "What do you want?" he asked them.

"Why are you and Cammie holding hands?" Liz asked.

"I somehow convinced her to trust me," he said and I felt him stroke my cheek. I leaned into his touch a little.

"She trusts us again?" Mom asked, sounding shocked and slightly relieved._ Fat chance!_

"No, she only trusts me," Zach sighed.

"Why does she only trust you?" Macey asked, sounding accusing.

"She said she only trusts me for now," Zach said. He sounded annoyed that Macey was accusing him of something.

"We will take what we can get Macey, at least she's starting to trust us again," Joe said.

"Alright," she muttered.

"Zach, try and get her to trust us again," Joe said.

"I'll try," he sighed out. I started to stir, like I was going to wake up. My eyes fluttered open and I saw everyone looking at me. I glared and looked away from them. Zach squeezed my hand and I turned to him curiously.

"Hey Gallagher girl," he smirked. "How are you feeling?" he asked as he brushed a strand of hair behind my ear.

"Fine," was my simple answer. "When can I leave?" I asked.

"Now if you want," he told me. I nodded my head and a nurse came in to unhook me. I avoided eye contact with everyone but Zach and even then I didn't hold his gaze longer than a second. Once I was unhooked, the nurse handed me a bottle of pills then I quickly started to change, then, when I was done with that, Zach led me out of the room and we walked back to his room.

Once in there, I settled on his neatly made bed and placed my pills on the bedside table while he picked up a few discarded shirts lying askew in around the room. It looked nice and tidy, just like when Blackthorne came here in sophomore year, the room looked perfectly clean, too clean. Too perfect. It was then, I remembered, that Zach isn't just a spy, he's also an assassin, whether he chooses to be or not. He will always have part assassin in him, because that's what Blackthorne trained him to be: a heartless killer.

Zach took a seat beside me and took my hand into his own bigger one, lacing our fingers together; it seemed to take forever for him to finally say, "You're going to be alright Gallagher girl."

But it seemed to be too quick of a reply when I said, "No, I won't."

He didn't argue. He didn't disagree. He didn't tell how wrong I was and that I truly would be _fine_, because, honestly, he didn't know that was true and he knows I see through his lies. We sat in silence for a long time before I, timidly, rested my head on his shoulder. He leaned his head on mine and wrapped his arm around my waist.

"I love you Zach," I whispered and closed my eyes. I felt his head move off mine and I could only guess he was looking at me. A few seconds later I felt a gentle kiss place on my head then,

"I love you Cammie," whispered into my hair and another kiss on my head before resting his head on mine again.

After a while, and Grant and Jonas never coming to the room, we ended up under the covers with his arm draped around my waist and spooning, his face was in my hair, his soft snores and hot breath made the hairs on the back of my neck stand up and goose bumps form on my arms and legs. Our legs were tangled together and my back was firmly held to his chest. He slept while I stayed wide awake. I lightly put my arm over his and lace our fingers together before finally closing my eyes and attempting to sleep some.

It didn't work.

I sighed silently and internally groaned. Guess I'm not getting any sleep, I thought in defeat. My eyes stayed on my pills that were mere inches from my face.

After a few minutes of silent contemplation, I carefully got up and out of Zach's arms. I put a pillow in my place and he pulled it closer, whispering "Cammie" and kissing it. My heart broke right then. I fought back tears as I took the pills off the bedside table and walked into the bathroom. I locked the door and sat the pill bottle on the counter then gripped the edges of the sink and cried silently.

"Cammie?" came Zach's groggy, not so alert, voice. "Cammie?" a slightly more alert voice asked. "Cammie!" Zach shouted and I heard stuff falling to the floor as his door slammed closed behind him. I cried harder and then decided that it was now or never.

I shakily took the pill bottle into my hand and slowly opened it. Outside the door I heard people run in. I put the bottle to my lips as a pounding on the door and shouts of "Cammie!" came from the other side. I poured the whole bottle in my mouth just as the door was kicked open, causing me to cough out the pills I had just attempted to swallow. Zach grabbed my arms and looked deeply into my eyes. I felt a number of pulls still in my mouth but I was too scared to swallow them with him looking into my eyes like he was now.

"How many did you swallow?" he asked as he gripped my upper arms and shrinking a bit to my level. I shook my head, looking into his wide eyes with my own, equally wide, eyes. Everyone was behind us, looking scared but we were lost in our own world, searching each other's eyes. He spoke again, slower than before, "How many did you swallow Cammie?"

I was tempted to swallow the ones in my mouth then but I didn't dare, not with the look he had in his eyes. I turned my head away and spit what was left in my mouth out and into the sink that already had a bunch of the others in it. I didn't meet anyone's eyes as they all looked at me with terror and worry.

"Was it Dr. Steve?" Liz whispered to Mom and Joe who didn't respond.

"Cammie…why?" Zach asked me, tilting my head to look into his eyes. I didn't respond; I just felt tears fill my eyes.

But not for the reason any of them thought. I wasn't crying because I was about to kill myself. I was crying because that was, very possibly, my only chance to.

They will never leave me by myself now.

I'll just have to try again later.

**A/N What Happens When You Run is finally coming to an end, only a few more chapters and it will be over…I'm kind of sad now :(.**

**R&R**

**~ Gracie**


	16. Chapter 16

**A/N ok, because this story **_**is**_** almost done, I guess I'll do you guys a solid and finish it then return to my other story. BUT ONLY THIS STORY IS BEING CONTINUED, THE OTHERS WILL HAVE TO WAIT UNTIL **_**LIVING WITH TWO WORLDS**_** IS COMPLETE!**

I was right.

They didn't let me be alone.

Zach refuses to leave my side.

The only time he lets me be alone is when I have to go to the bathroom and even then I have to have Bex, Macey and/or Liz with me.

At night, he handcuffs me to him.

He is very serious about not leaving me alone. He doesn't even leave for me to change; he doesn't watch he just doesn't _leave_. Jonas and Grant had to go back to Blackthorne so we ended up being roomies thanks to my mom.

We walk around all day, side by side. The teachers have partnered us together for everything. We are seated next to each other. We eat together. It's actually really cute, you know, if it wasn't because I attempted suicide…on purpose…

We were currently sitting in Joe's class, waiting for him to walk in. And, as if on cue, he walked in.

"Meet me out front in ten minutes, wear normal clothes," and then he left.

Wow.

Zach took my hand and books before leading us out without a word to anyone. Not that I would have spoken to them anyways. I still won't talk to anyone but Zach. Even though now I barely talk to him either. It may seem a bit messed up to anyone who didn't know our situation (and some of those who do) but I'm mad at him. He took away my one chance to leave this life, to be with my dad and away from his mom.

To be happy.

So as he dragged me through the hallways behind him I glared at the back of his head. He was a bit annoyed at me for being mad at him but he didn't let him get to him. He was being sweet to me instead.

God, why did he have to be sweet?

Why can't we fight?

Why can't we yell and scream at each other?

Be at each other's throats?

I'd gladly let him finish the job…

That thought made me tense up and try to pull his hand away, go and hide in the walls. Get away from everyone. I was scared. I was getting worried looks and I was starting to hyperventilate from everyone looking at me. I was too noticed. I felt naked. I needed to get away.

"Zach," I tried to pull away. "Zach! Zach, let go!" I was freaking out and taking deep breathes. I felt beads of sweat form on my brows as I recoiled at his touch and tried to pull away from his vise grip. "Let go!" I shouted and tugged my hand away and ran.

"Cammie!" I heard people shout behind me and footsteps.

I ran faster.

"Leave me alone!" I ended up in the Hall of History and running to my mother's door at the end of the hall. I stopped before I could run in. I turned on my heels but saw everyone running at me, making me stumble back and trip, falling into my mom's office. I scrambled backwards until my back hit a wall. I was still breathing heavy.

All the Gallagher girls from my year, Zach, Joe and Mom were all in the room, coming towards me. My breathing picked up and I felt myself getting dizzy.

"I trusted you!" I hissed at Zach before blackness consumed me. "I trusted you," I slurred out.

I passed out.

-Page Break-

My eyes fluttered open, burning from the bright lights of my room. I closed them again and heard a chuckle. They snapped back open and looked at the woman in my hospital room.

"Hello Cameron," she smirked.

"Where is Zach?" I asked, noticing he wasn't in the room.

"CoveOps, perfect timing by the way Cameron, I needed to barrow you," she said and to big guys walked in. She walked up to me and injected a needle in my arm along with a thick liquid that was a sickly yellow shade. "Talk to you soon," she whispered before my world turned black again.

-Page Break-

"Wake up!" someone snapped and I felt my face sting as it made contact with something else.

"I'm awake," I mumbled. I looked up and saw a very amused looking Catherine Goode. I glared at her.

"I heard about your suicide attempt," she said casually as she started to circle me and examine her nails.

"I'm not surprised," I muttered and felt her slap the back of my head.

"As I was saying, I think that was a pity. Such talent, wasted away," she trailed off, a pathetic look on her face as she circled back around and stared me down.

"What are you getting at?" I inquired as I sat back in the steel chair I was _chained_ to.

"No beating around the bush with you is there?" she asked with a light laugh.

I didn't respond.

"Alright, well, see, I was talking with my superiors and they agreed that you could be a great asset to us," she said as she leaned back against the wall, hands behind her back and a curious look on her face along with a small smile.

"You're asking me to join the Circle?" I asked like she was stupid but she just nodded enthusiastically. My lips curled into an evil smile that could give the devil himself nightmares. "No," I said.

"No? Why are you smiling like that then?" she asked and she narrowed her eyes and stepped closer. My smile turned as innocent as an angel.

"Like what?" I asked as if nothing were wrong. "Do you like screams of pain Cathy?" I asked her, my smile gone. She hesitated before answering,

"Yes," she took another step forward. I smiled and closed my eyes again.

"That's all I needed to know," I muttered.

I heard her huff. "So you _aren't_ joining the Circle?" she asked again.

"Nope," I verified and popped the 'p'.

"Fine, you're too stubborn to be swayed so I'll just let you finish what you started," she shrugged and left a knife on the floor before pulling a set of keys from her pocket and unchaining me. She pointed to the one way mirror next to us. "We'll be watching," she smirked and walked out.

"We?" I asked. I looked around the room and behind me was a camera. With a blinking red light. Telling me everyone would be watching soon, if not now. My eyes drifted to the knife that was on the floor. I walked over to it and picked it up. I fingered the tip and felt myself shudder with something as I dragged my finger delicately down the blade.

I took a deep breath and closed my eyes as I brought the blade to my neck…

**A/N CLIFFY! :)**

**R&R **

**~ Gracie**


	17. Chapter 17

**A/N did y'all like my cliffy? Of course not! :D I didn't either but I felt I hadn't had a decent cliffy in a while and that felt right…anyway, back to the story!**

_I took a deep breath and closed my eyes as I brought the blade to my neck…_and pressed down. I felt the skin tear and a drop of blood trickle down my neck. I pressed down more and felt the tears fill my eyes and stream down my cheeks as I held the knife there, still in my neck and causing blood to flow down to my collarbone and strain my shirt.

Did I really want to leave everyone?

Could I really leave Zach?

Was I seriously going to take the easy way out?

…Yes.

Yes I was.

I took another deep breath and carried the knife across my neck, cutting deep and letting blood pool out of it. The knife fell from my hand as my head and neck separated a bit as it lulled back, letting more blood pour out.

My eyes rolled back and I fell to the floor.

"I'm sorry," I whispered as my world went black for the final time…

**Catherine's POV**

"I'm sorry," Cameron whispered and then died.

"She's bleeding out on my floor." I stated bluntly. "Box her up and send her to her _precious school_, they can do with her what they will," I told the two guys behind me, still looking at the body. I followed them into the room and got my camera, following the guys as they boxed her in an odd angle and taped it up.

"This will be one hell of a tape for them," I smiled evilly. I walked back to my office and uploaded the tape to my computer and into a hard drive.

I sent the hard drive like I sent the tapes and then went to my room to sleep happily.

**ZPOV**

We were all walking to Cammie's hospital room, we weren't allowed in until after school so we didn't know what was happening. She's been alone all day. That made my feet move a little bit faster.

I reached her door first and threw it open to find Gallagher girl wasn't there. I started panicking and searching the room for her. Under the bed, in the cabinets, even the hallways and bathroom; I couldn't find her. We were all making our way back to the room we were sharing to look for her there when we saw Bubble Gum Guard walking up to us with a very large box in his hands and a small flash drive sitting on top of it.

"For you," he said and handed the box to Joe who wrinkled his nose with disgust.

"Why does it smell so bad?" he asked. Bubble Gum Guard shrugged and hurried back to his post. We walked to Ms. Morgan's office and sat the box down before gathering around her desk as she put the flash drive in. A single file came up so we opened it and saw a video.

We played it and it showed Mom standing in front of Cammie, who had her head fallen forward and was chained to a metal chair. We could only see the back of her head because of the camera's position.

"Wake up!" she shouted and slapped Cammie.

"I'm awake," Cammie mumbled and looked up at my mom who was smiling, amused at Cammie.

"I heard about your suicide attempt," Mom said casually as she circled Cammie and examined her nails but the way she said it made us all cringe.

"I'm not surprised," Cammie replied sarcastically and Mom slapped her upside the head before circling back around.

"As I was saying, I think that was a pity. Such talent, wasted away," Mom gave her a pitiful look and trailed off.

"What are you getting at?" Cammie asked and leaned back in the chair.

"No beating around the bush with you is there?" Mom asked and laughed lightly. How were they talking so casually?! Cammie didn't respond to her so Mom continued, "Alright, well, see, I was talking with my superiors and they agreed that you could be a great asset to us," she said as she leaned back against the wall, hands behind her back and a curious look on her face along with a small smile.

"You're asking me to join the Circle?" Cammie asked like she was stupid and mom nodded vigorously. Cammie was silent for a moment which caused us to all hold our breath. "No." and then we started breathing again.

"No? Why are you smiling like that then?" Mom asked with narrowed eyes and stepped forward. Cammie was smiling?

"Like what?" she asked in a more cheery voice. "Do you like screams of pain Cathy?" Cammie asked.

"I don't like where this is going," Macey muttered what everyone was thinking.

"Yes," Mom said and took another step forward. She was studying Cammie.

"That's all I needed to know," Cammie muttered.

Mom huffed. "So you _aren't_ joining the Circle?" she asked.

"Nope," Cammie popped the 'p'.

"Fine, you're too stubborn to be swayed so I'll just let you finish what you started," she shrugged and left something on the floor before pulling a set of keys from her pocket and unchaining Cammie. She pointed to the one way mirror next to them. "We'll be watching," she smirked and walked out.

"We?" Cammie asked. She stood up and looked around the room but her eyes landed on the camera. Her face paled slightly before her eyes fell to whatever it was that Mom sat on the floor. She moved closer to the object. She picked it up to reveal it to be a knife, making me suck in a sharp breath and my heart stop.

She fingered the tip and then slid her finger down the blade. She took a deep breath and closed her eyes as she brought the blade to her neck.

"No," Liz whispered and Bex pulled her into her arms as she cried, but Bex was crying too. So were Macey, Joe and Ms. Morgan.

She pressed the blade into her skin and a drop of blood fell from the cut. She started to cry and so did I.

"Gallagher girl, please," I whispered to the screen as I gripped the arm of Ms. Morgan's chair and the side of her desk.

She took another deep breath and stopped the tears before dragging the knife the rest of the way. Macey and Bex both squeaked an odd noise and threw their hands over their mouths. Joe was holding Ms. Morgan closely as they both cried. All I could do was watch the screen in horror as Gallagher girl's head lulled back and more blood pour from her neck. She had dropped the knife and her eyes rolled back.

She fell to the ground, "I'm sorry."

A few seconds later two big guys came in and dragged Cammie's body out while my mom got the camera and followed them. I watched as they stuffed her body into a box at odd angles.

"This will be one hell of a tape for them," Mom said and the screen went black. I silently backed away and went over to the box. Scared about what I was going to see.

"Joe, I think the girls should leave," I told him once it was open.

"No, we need to see," Macey said and then it occurred to me that none of them had been watching after Cammie slit her throat. They didn't see the end.

"Liz doesn't need to see it. Seriously," I said in a very serious voice.

"What is it Zach?" Ms. Morgan asked me, stepping out of Joe's arms and towards me. They were determined to see and I wasn't about to get tore apart for stopping them.

"Cammie," I whispered and stepped aside for them to see.

There were gasps and crying but I couldn't really think all that clearly as reality hit me like a ton of bricks.

Gallagher girl is gone.

Cammie is gone.

_Cammie is gone._

Forever.

And.

Ever.

She is never coming back.

She won't be around anymore.

No more seeing her smile.

Her unruly hair in the morning.

Her beautiful brown eyes that sparkle when she's happy.

The way she rolls her eyes and uses sarcasm far too much and can still get away with it.

The way she walks in the walls like a true chameleon.

She was the perfect girl.

My perfect girl.

She's gone.

Cammie is _gone_.

I walked aimlessly through the halls as girls and teachers walked about. I ended up in Cammie's favorite passageway. I slumped to the floor and started crying.

I don't know how long I was there, or what time it was. But I know that after a while I stood up and walked out of the passageway and into the manicured lawn, staring at the starry sky. I stuffed my hands deep into my pockets and felt my heart breaking a bit more every second.

"You didn't die in vain Cammie. I'll get her back for hurting you. I promise."

**A/N the end! I might do a sequel in Zach's POV where he's hell bent on revenge but I'm still debating. It will be a few months before I start on it if I do. Well, I hope you all enjoyed the story and thank you for reading!**

**R&R**

**~ Gracie**


	18. PLEASE READ!

**~*~ Author's Note ~*~**

**Can you believe it? It's over. This story actually started off as a possible one-shot. I want to thank you guys who favorite, followed and reviewed **_**What Happens When You Run**_**, you inspired me to create this story and finish it. This is the first story where I had to pour my heart out to get this so raw and emotional. I know it got pretty intense in some scenes but that was the point.**

**But yeah, I can't believe it's over. I loved this story so much! I had so much fun writing it and cried through a lot of it. I was always thinking of was to improve it or make it better for the readers, always trying to tug at the heart strings.**

**You guys are awesome, if it wasn't for you, this story might never had gotten past the first chapter.**

**I know the ending is pretty sad and I hope it made you cry (that was kind of the point). If you think I should continue a sequel with Zach, please, don't hesitate to tell me in a review. If I get 10 reviews to make the sequel then you can expect to see it up within a few months time.**

**Again, thank you guys, you were awesome!**

**R&R**

**~ Gracie ~**


	19. Chapter 19

**~*~ **_**ALTERNATE**__**ENDING**_** ~*~**

**A/N so, I know a lot of you didn't like how the story ended, well not that you didn't like it, you just wished it ended differently. Honestly, I thought it was an excellent way to end a depressing story like this but I want my readers to be happy, so I have an alternate ending for you guys! :D**

**This will be a few chapters long, maybe four or five. I hope you like this. It is started from chapter 17. ENJOY!**

_I took a deep breath and closed my eyes as I brought the blade to my neck…_and pressed down. I felt the skin tear and a drop of blood trickle down my neck. I pressed down more and felt the tears fill my eyes and stream down my cheeks as I held the knife there, still in my neck and causing blood to flow down to my collarbone and strain my shirt.

Did I really want to leave everyone?

Could I really leave Zach?

Was I seriously going to take the easy way out?

I took a glance at the camera and decided it wasn't worth it. I had people that cared for me, loved me. I didn't have the heart to do this to them. I would rather be tortured than put them through the pain of losing me, especially by my own hand.

I slowly pulled the knife away from my neck, felt the cool metal slide against my torn skin as I removed it from my neck. I stared straight into the mirror where Catherine was standing and dropped the knife. I sat back in the chair, folded my arms, crossed my legs and stared at the door with a defiant look on my face.

A few moments later Catherine walked back in and looked really pissed off. "Join the Circle!" she shouted, she was right in front of my face.

"No." I said firmly. Her cat like eyes narrowed and she picked up the blade.

"Fine," she came at me but what she oh-so-sadly forgot was that she forgot to chain me back to the chair. I kicked the knife from her hand and started fighting her. She was caught off guard which was enough for me to advance.

I kicked her upside the head, knocking her out. Two big guys came in and just as one swung his arms at me, trying to grab me, I lunged under him, for the knife. I took it and threw it at the other guy, getting him directly in the forehead.

I winced.

The other guy was distracted, looking at his buddy. So I jumped onto his back and snapped his neck. I ran out without a second thought. My main goal, clouding my thoughts and better judgment, was to get out alive.

I ran.

I ran down dark halls.

I didn't see anyone.

At all.

That was either a good sigh or a very bad one.

I was on guard as I quickly ran out.

I ran outside and saw that I was _very_ far from home.

The reason I knew was because the only thing around this door in the ground was sand.

Sand for miles.

I ran; I didn't care where I was going, so long as I was away from here.

The sand was hot under my feet but that didn't much matter when my dehydration started to catch up to me. I started to see double but shook my head and fought it off as I continued to run. I saw, in the distance, what looked like a helicopter coming towards me.

Just a hallucination.

I shook my head again and continued running.

The helicopter landed a bit away and I saw Zach running over in nothing but a white V neck t-shirt and light wash jeans with holes in the knees, he might be wearing sandals, I couldn't tell. He grabbed my upper arms and was shouting something, looking frantic.

Just a hallucination.

I shook my head and pushed myself out of his arms. I started running again before I couldn't feel my feet hitting the ground. There was something weird about this hallucination. I didn't like it. It wasn't processing in my brain.

Where was I again?

My eyes started to flutter shut.

I felt something patting my cheek.

I didn't know what was happening.

I opened my eyes and saw everyone looking at me. I looked around and saw I was in a helicopter, my head was resting in Zach's lap, and Joe was flying.

My throat was too dry.

My tongue tasted like sand.

My eyes hurt.

My skin burned.

My muscles ached.

I was sore all over.

My feet felt like they were bleeding.

My neck stung.

Everyone was talking but I couldn't make out the words.

Zach placed a cold, wet cloth on my forehead. I was looking at his face while he talked to everyone else. I brought my hand up to his cheek and brushed my fingers against it. He looked down at me.

He felt so…_real_.

I squinted my eyes and squished both his cheeks with my hands. I was pulling them apart and pushing them together, pouting his lips. He just looked down at me while I did this, over and over again.

He felt so…_real_.

I took my hands away completely and looked at everyone else. They all looked so real. I sat up and shook my head, knocking the cloth away.

Just a hallucination.

I stepped to the side on the helicopter, towards the door. Just as I was about to step out, I felt multiple hands grab me and pull me back. I was sat on the seat where Zach and I were a moment ago. He had both my hands and was squatting in front of me. His eyes were wide and his mouth was moving but I just couldn't make out the words.

My eyes fluttered again.

I ignored the patting on my cheek and let the darkness consume me…

**A/N weeeeeeeell? Before anyone asks, Cammie was in the desert (did I spell that right?). Tell me what you think about the alternate ending so far!**

**R&R**

**~ Gracie**


	20. Chapter 20

**A/N I'm glad you guys like the alternate ending! :D**

I had an aching feeling all over.

My neck hurt.

My feet were sore.

My skin burned.

My head ached.

My throat was raw.

My mouth tasted like sand.

My memories started to catch up to me…

I remember bring the knife to my neck.

I remember cutting my skin.

My eyes fluttered open and I saw Zach looking at me from beside a bed. He had tears in his eyes and was gripping my hand tightly. Like his life depended on it.

"Am I dead?" I choked out. His fingers brushed against my cheek.

"No, Cam." He whispered.

I started to remember more from the other day.

I was running…through a desert.

How long had I been out?

"You weren't a hallucination, were you?" I asked him. He smirked a little but shook his head. "Sorry for almost falling off the helicopter," I apologized.

"You didn't, that's all that matters," he mumbled and brushed his fingers against my cheek again. Dr. Wolf walked in with a clip board. She smiled when she saw me.

"Hello Cameron, good to see you're awake," she greeted. "I need you to tell us what happened to you," she said. I noticed everyone else was in the room, keeping their distance.

"You didn't get a tape?" I asked. They looked just as confused as I did. Guess Catherine didn't want to send one where she loses. "I was in the hospital wing after my…break down?" I asked but didn't wait for an answer, "and when I came to, Catherine started talking to me then injected me with something. I woke up chained to a metal chair. Catherine was there in the room with me, she talked to me about my suicide attempt and how much of a 'pity' it was then asked me to join the Circle," everyone in the room sucked in a sharp breath with I paused to breathe, "but I told her no." they sighed in relief. "She unchained me and left a knife on the floor saying I could just finish the job then. So I picked up the knife and…" I trail off, not really wanting to continue.

Zach gave my hand a slight squeeze, urging me to continue, so I did.

"And I started to cut my throat, but then I stopped. I dropped the knife and sat back in the chair which pissed Catherine off so she came back in and picked the knife up. She didn't chain me back to the chair"-Joe said something along the lines of 'rookie mistake' -"so I kicked the knife from her hand and roundhouse kicked her, knocking her out. Then her goons came in…they're dead now…and I ran," I finished.

There was long silence before Zach spoke.

"What happened after you started running?" he asked.

"I was just running randomly through the desert. I kept having hallucinations so when I saw the helicopter and you guys I just thought it was another hallucination," I shrugged and felt my skin burn and sting when I did. I glanced down at my arms and saw they were seriously red.

I had a major sunburn.

"At least this will be an awesome tan," I commented softly and felt more than hurt Zach chuckle.

"So, Catherine is dead?" Liz asked timidly.

"No," I sighed out.

"Its fine Gallagher girl," Zach reassured. I nodded even though I didn't agree.

"What, exactly, is my condition?" I asked Dr. Wolf.

"The bottom of your feet are tore and it's going to hurt to walk until they heal, as you can see, a very bad sunburn, dehydration, and that cut in your neck…" she hesitated, "If it had been a bit deeper…you could have bled out," she said and held her fingers millimeters apart, almost touching.

I gave a weak nod. She walked out and Zach scooted closer to me.

"Are you going to try to…to kill yourself again?" he whispered to me as tears filled his eyes. I think it literally hurt him to ask me that.

I've seen Zach cry more in this past year than I would have imagined he'd ever cry in his whole life. I didn't like seeing Zach cry. He was tough, cocky…an assassin. Seeing him cry, it was unsettling.

I thought about his question and took it into consideration. After looking into his watery eyes for a few minutes I finally settled with an answer that I was comfortable with.

"I don't think so," I closed my eyes and rested. After about half an hour, I heard the door open and people walking out then the door closed.

"I can't lose you Cammie," Zach whispered and kissed my sunburned cheek gently. I heard him leave too. After everyone left I was alone with my thoughts. I thought about my life and how suck-y Catherine had made it.

I thought and thought and thought until I finally decided it was time to have a talk with my mom. I carefully got out of bed and snuck out of my room, ignoring the pain in my feet and skin as I moved swiftly down the hall, trying not to be noticed.

At least, not for a while.

I walked up to Mom's office and hesitated before knocking, and just as I, slowly, brought my hand up to the door, it swung open and Joe stood before me, looking slightly shocked.

"Um, can I speak with Mom?" I asked softly. I hate to admit it, but I was timid standing this close to Joe Solomon, he towered over me and had an intimidating atmosphere around him.

He may be my Godfather.

He may have a sweet spot when it came to me (even if he had a weird way of showing it).

He may be the closest thing to a father figure I have.

He may be willing to give his life to save mine.

But he still scared me.

And right now, I was more than terrified.

I felt so small standing in front of him.

I felt so fragile.

So vulnerable.

He nodded his head and stepped aside for me to step in. I walked past him slowly and saw that Aunt Abby, along with Mom, Zach, Bex, Liz and Macey had been in the room. They all looked at me surprised but Abby looked on the verge of tears.

I guess they were catching her up on this past year's events.

"Um…I need to talk to Mom," I whispered as I folded my hands together in front of me and stared at my feet. Nobody made a move to leave but Joe, so I scuffed my toes against the rug and whispered, "Alone."

Everyone shuffled to their feet and rushed out, except Zach, who walked up to me and gently kissed my forehead before following everyone else out the door. Mom sat at her desk with her hands folded together and sitting properly.

Once the door closed behind Zach, I sat on the couch in front of her desk and twiddled my thumbs, thinking of how I should start. Mom sat patiently and waited for me to speak.

"I know graduation is coming up and I also know I haven't been here as much as the other girls and Zach-"

"You're graduating with your year Cammie, don't worry," Mom cut me off. I shook my head and furrowed my brows as I studied my hands.

"That's not what I'm getting at. It's after graduation," I paused as I figured out what it was I wanted to say and how to put it. I decided to just be blunt about it, "I don't want to be a spy."

There was a silence, Mom looking shocked and me twiddling me thumbs and shuffling my feet nervously. After Mom didn't say anything for a while, I looked up at her.

"Mom?" I asked.

She blinked, like she forgot I was there, before she started straightening the already straight papers on her desk for a moment.

"Um, I see what you're saying Cammie, but are you sure you don't want work at the CIA or Interpol or NSA or-" she started rambling on about other federal agencies but I cut her off.

"I'm sure," I said quietly. She searched my eyes for a while before she sighed and started to fiddle with a pen that was on her desk.

"What would you rather be?" she asked as she flipped the pen between her fingers, like a drummer would his **(or her)** drum sticks.

"I don't really know, maybe be a teacher?" I asked and she perked up at that, letting the pen drop to her desk.

"You could work here! You could work with Joe or-" I cut her off again.

"No, I mean a regular teacher, for civilian students," I said with a shake of the head and staring at my feet. She fell silent again.

"Why?" she asked in a broken whisper.

"This place holds to many memories, and there are more people like Catherine still out there. I don't think I can go through any of this anymore, I just don't think I could last," I said softly. The door burst open and everyone was standing behind Liz who fell into the room.

"Oopsie daisy," she muttered as Bex and Macey helped her up.

"Were you eavesdropping?" Mom asked and she stood up. Joe and Abby walked up with guilty looks on their faces and Mom dropped back to her seat with a huff. "It was Abby's idea, wasn't it?" she asked.

"Yeah," Joe and Abby both mumbled, their heads bowed down in shame, probably more because they were caught rather than doing it in the first place.

I was tempted to just walk away now, but I knew that would do me no good because this conversation was far from over.

**A/N another cliffy!**

**R&R**

**~ Gracie**


	21. Chapter 21

**A/N I'm sad I haven't gotten as many reviews as usual :( but that's ok! :) ENJOY!**

_Everyone had gathered into Mom's office and they were all talking, trying to convince me to see otherwise and that I could still work behind a desk, but I didn't want to listen, so I closed my eyes and leaned back on the couch._

_The cool leather felt nice on my sunburn._

_I opened my eyes when all I could hear was muffled and slurred voices._

_Everyone was a blur._

_I reached out to touch them but they just seemed to getting further away from me._

I jolted up right and saw Catherine clutching her stomach and leaning against the wall. I was still chained to that damn chair.

I was still trapped.

"You bitch!" I shouted at her. She immediately stopped laughing and walked in front of me.

She slapped me.

I started to bounce around in my chair, trying desperately to get free.

It was all in vain.

"I will break you Cameron. And when I do, you will join the Circle," she told me. She walked behind me and took something off my head then walked back in front of me to show me a helmet with weird electronics on it. "This tampers with your brain, makes you think what it tells you," she went on. "That little dream of your, that was the tester," she nodded then smirked as she puts it back on my head.

I started to shake my head and struggle.

"Fight it all you want Cameron, but you won't win this time," she whispered. "And your _lovely_ family and friends get to watch," she beamed.

"This is live?" I asked, dropping my head in defeat.

"Yes it is," she said as if talking to a five year old, which led me to growl in response.

"You crazy bitch!" I screamed and struggled more.

She slapped me again.

I didn't stop struggling.

"You Morgan's are so stubborn," she murmured as she walked out.

I started to shake my head, trying to throw the thing off. I felt it started to tighten around my head.

So tight.

Too tight.

I screamed in pain, wrenching forward as my back arched.

Tears flowed down my face.

My mind went blank.

_You are a member of the Circle of Cavan._

_You are a member of the Circle of Cavan._

_You are a member of the Circle of Cavan._

_You are a member of the Circle of Cavan._

_You are a member of the Circle of Cavan._

_You are a member of the Circle of Cavan._

_You are a member of the Circle of Cavan._

Something was pulled of my head; heavy metal fell off my body. I opened my eyes and was staring at a smirking Catherine Goode.

"What do you feel?" she asked.

Numb.

Annoyed.

Mad.

Angry.

Furious.

All I saw was red.

I lunged at her, wrapping my hands around her neck and tackling her to the ground, pinning her in place.

"You fucking bitch! What is wrong with you?! Trying to brain wash me!" I was bashing her head into the ground as I suffocated her. "I hate you! You ruined my life! You have made my last year in school a living hell!" Blood was starting to trail from under her head. "I can't even look at men the same way! I can't look at my friends without thinking they hate me or will turn on me! I lost all trust in my mom because of you!" her eyes were rolling back and her face was turning blue.

I wasn't done talking to her, so I loosened my grip a little.

"You brain washed me into killing myself! You tortured me! You got me pregnant then made me lose the baby!" not that I wanted it… "It's because of you I can't sleep at night! It's because you I don't eat! It's because of you that I can't trust!" I had tears streaming down my face again. "It's because of you that all I can think about anymore are those horrible memories…and that I can _never_ love again…" I paused a second before bashing her head one more time.

Really hard.

Killing her.

Ending the life of yet another person.

I looked down at her dead body, tears falling off my face and onto hers.

I crawled off her and into a corner, pulling my legs to my chest and wrapping my arms around my knees.

I looked at Catherine's body.

"You did it," I told the body, smiling, tears falling like never ending waterfalls down my face. "You finally broke me," I laughed despite myself then rested my head on my knees, crying, shaking violently as I did.

How long will I be in this room before someone finds me?

Who is going to find me?

Does it really matter?

No.

No it doesn't.

Because I won't be happy no matter whom it is.

I am broken.

I laughed again.

"Fucking bitch!" I laughed.

I was hysterical.

The tears were falling from my eyes and some laughs were coming from my mouth. My laughs slowly died down as I rested my head sideways on my knees, looking at the door, as I thought about that machine.

I looked at it closely from my spot.

"Why didn't you work?" I asked it quietly.

I shrugged, not really feeling like it mattered.

I giggled a little as the tears slowed and I feel asleep, there, on the nasty floor.

Next to a dead body.

-Page Break-

I woke up to the noise of helicopter propellers.

My head was resting on something hard and there was something wrapped around me, holding me in place.

I opened my eyes and saw that I was, indeed, on a helicopter. I looked up and saw that Zach had his arm around me and I was asleep on his chest. He looked down and me, worry evident in his eyes.

"Hey," he whispered.

I closed my eyes and snuggled closer to him, getting comfortable.

"Hey," I replied.

I killed his mom.

"Are you ok?" I asked him, looking up into his eyes.

"You're asking if _I'm_ ok?" he asked, looking very confused.

"Yeah, your mom just died," my voice lowered to a whispered and my eyes fell.

"That bitch deserved to die for everything she did to you," he pulled me closer. From the corner of my eye, I saw Mom look back at us from the cockpit before hitting the person flying. Joe looked back at us before looking back in front of us. They started talking.

Zach kissed the top of my head.

"Zach?" I asked as I looked up at him once more.

"Yeah?" he asked.

I looked deep into his beautiful emerald eyes; so much like his mother's, yet so different. I was on the verge of tears as I thought of how he would react to what I was about to say.

His hand cupped my cheek and he stroked it with his thumb.

"I'm sorry," I whispered, looking down at his chest, not meeting his eyes.

"What do you have to be sorry for?" he asked as he tilted my head up again.

"I'm sorry that I can't love you," I whispered as tears fell.

I buried my head into his chest and clutched his shirt as I cried.

"I'm sorry that I can't trust in order to love you," I whispered.

I felt him wrap his arms around me and I shifted into his lap, so he could hold me closer.

No matter how uncomfortable the action made me.

I felt his chest rumble as he breathed and I knew he was crying too, or at least trying not to.

"I want to be able to trust you, to love you, but I-I just can't," I shook my head and felt one of his hands place itself there, holding my head to his chest. "I just can't," I whispered.

"We can get through this Cammie. Please, please don't give up on us," he sobbed, holding me closer. "Please," he whispered.

"I can't trust you Zach, I'm just not able to trust," I shook my head.

He tilted my head up again.

"Cammie, you know I would never hurt you. I would take a bullet for you. I love you," he leaned his forehead onto mine. "Please," he whispered.

I hesitated before leaning my lips up to meet his.

He seemed just as hesitant, almost scared.

But I was too.

It was slow and passionate and I could tell he was pouring every ounce of love he had for me into it, but I still couldn't feel what I use to when we kissed.

I couldn't find my own love to add.

I pulled back and rest my head on his chest again.

"I'm sorry," I whispered again.

I heard him sigh and rest his head on mine, kissing it once.

"Even if you can't return the feelings, I still love you," he whispered.

The chopper landed and Zach picked me up effortlessly before I could even get out of his lap.

I shouldn't have kissed him. He was probably hell bent on making me love him again now.

I sighed, knowing he would either fail or succeed at this point.

I turned to Mom and Joe who were walking hand in hand beside us.

"Mom," I got her attention. "I need to talk to you," I told her, getting both Joe and Zach's attention as well. "Alone," I added.

"Cameron," Joe started. "We aren't letting Zach leave your side anymore," Joe stated slowly.

"Alright, just Zach and Mom than," I shrugged and rested my head back on Zach's hard chest, feeling his heartbeat pick up the slightest bit at this action.

We walked in, me still being carried, up the stairs and to Mom's office. Bex, Liz and Macey were all waiting in there, tears in their eyes.

"Hey Cam," Macey waved a little as they walked up to me.

I felt myself unconsciously tense up.

They stopped short and I looked away from them, shame evident in my eyes.

"Girl, Cammie needs to speak with Zach and me," Mom started. "If you would give us a minute," she gestured to the door and they nodded, following Joe out.

Zach sat down on the couch and Mom sat in her desk chair.

Zach held me close.

I looked into his eyes; they were so full of hope.

I turned to Mom; she looked desperate to have her daughter back.

"I want to forget," I told her. Zach tensed up and Mom looked shocked.

But I wasn't backing out.

"I don't want to remember any of this. I'd rather have a year and a half gone from my memory than live every day of my life with trust issues, paranoia, and," I turned to Zach, "not being able to love Zach."

He rested his forehead on mine.

"I don't think that's a good idea Cam" –I cut him off.

"I want to be happy again Zach. And I can't be happy knowing I won't be able to trust or love or have faith in anybody," I told him. Then I laughed. "I'm so broken mentally and physically and emotionally," I laughed harder. "I-I need to just…forget," I closed my eyes, calming from my giggles.

There was a long silence.

"Alright kiddo," Mom said. "Let me talk to Joe about this, then we will tell you if it's a good idea or not," Mom stood and walked out.

"Gallagher girl, how are you gonna catch up on school?" Zach asked.

He's trying to talk me out of it?

Why?

"If Macey can catch up five years worth of school in three years I think I can catch up on one in a few months," I chuckled, readjusting myself a bit.

Zach sighed and rested his head on mine.

We stayed like that for a bit.

"Why don't you want me to do this?" I asked, removing myself from under his chin. I looked into his eyes. "Don't you want the old Cammie back?" I cocked my head to the side.

"I just want you," he held me closer and sighed.

"Zach" – Mom and Joe walked in.

"Alright Cammie, we've discussed it and we don't think it's a good idea," Mom said and just as I was about to protest, Joe cut me off.

"But we are going to let you anyways." He told me. "I've been in the field for eighteen years, and nothing like what happened to you in this past year and a half has ever happened to me; not even close," he shook his head, looking at his shoes.

"And because we know you, we know you will stop at nothing to remember what you forgot. So we want you to write down to yourself that you don't want to remember. That way when you wake up later, we can give you the note from yourself and you won't try to remember." Mom said and handed me a piece of paper and pen.

"If you ever ask questions about it, we will tell you don't want to remember," Joe said.

"Dr. Fibs and Elizabeth are in the in the lab working on a way to fade your scars, so you won't ask question about them either," Mom added.

"Are you sure you want to do this?" Zach asked.

I looked at his desperate eyes.

I nodded.

I leaned over to the desk, still in Zach's lap, and started to write.

'_I'm sure you'll want to know why you can't remember anything from the past year and a half, but trust me on this: __**You don't want to know**__. You will have to catch up on some school work though, so focus on that._

_It was your idea to drink the memory tea and if you wanted to forget then obviously it was very bad._

_Don't ask questions, don't try to remember, don't think about what was so bad that you would want to desperately forget. Just be happy that you don't have to remember,_

_Cameron Ann Morgan_'

I read the note over and over again, looking for mistakes and anything that could be changed.

It was pretty vague and didn't give anything away.

"Done," I held the note out to Mom and Joe.

They read it together than looked into my eyes.

"Alright, I'll go tell Bex, Liz and Macey that you've decided to go through with this," Joe walked out, handing Mom the note. She handed it to Zach while she walked to her desk and pulled out a packet of memory tea then walked to her bookshelf. She pulled a book and it opened up to a tea maker.

Weird.

"I'll make sure you can remember the obvious stuff, like your age and the date," Mom told me as the tea brewed, rather fast might I add.

She handed me the steaming cup then walked out, leaving Zach and I alone.

I brought it to my lips.

"Cammie, are you sure about this?" Zach asked; he was looking so unsure.

I sighed and closed my eyes.

"Yes," I whispered and started to drink the hot tea.

The next few hours past by so fast.

Zach had carried me out and took me to Dr. Fibs' lab to hide my scars. Bex, Liz and Macey cried. Joe and Mom were getting together everything I would need to learn after forgetting. Zach was holding my note in his pocket and refused to let me walk. I was trying to stay awake so I didn't fall asleep too early.

By the time Zach had gotten us to our room, I was just fighting to keep my eyes open. He kept glancing down at me.

"You know, when you wake up tomorrow, I'm going to make sure you start eating more. I've been carrying you for the past three hours, you don't weigh much," he told me. I barely managed a nod and felt my eyes start to close.

He laid me on the bed and got in next to me, holding me close to him.

"I love you Cammie," he whispered then I fell asleep.

-Page Break-

I felt someone holding me to them, tightly.

I opened my eyes and saw Zach.

"Ah! Zach! What are you doing…in…my…room?" My scream died down as I looked around the room. I tried to remember how I got in here and realized I couldn't.

Zach was looking at me curiously.

"What?" I asked and looked down.

I was in Liz' clothes.

They were big.

"Why am I in Liz' clothes? Why am I in here? Why are _you_ in here? Shouldn't you be at Blackthorne?" I asked him, scrambling to get out of the bed. He was still looking at me. "Say something Zach," I told him, trying not to freak out.

"Your clothes don't fit anymore, I go to school here now and this was my room but as of recently it's _our_ room," he told me, getting up as well.

"Our room? What are talking about? Mom would never approve of that," I said and raised an eyebrow as he wrapped his arms around my waist.

"It was her idea actually," he shrugged then met my eyes. "How do you feel?"

"Fine?" I answered, unsure. "Why don't I remember any of this?" I asked and stared at my feet in frustration. I heard Zach sigh and then he tilted my head up so I was looking into his eyes.

"What _do_ you remember?" he asked.

I thought back.

I couldn't remember anything for a while back.

"Y-you asked me to run away with you and…I was going to but…I decided it would be best to go alone then…I woke up here," I furrowed my brows. "Why can't I remember?" I asked him. Zach reached into his pocket and pulled out a folded piece of paper.

"You wrote it to yourself yesterday," he told me.

"But I don't remember" –he cut me off.

"Just read it."

I sat on the bed and opened the paper to see my hand writing, I read it.

'_I'm sure you'll want to know why you can't remember anything from the past year, but trust me on this: __**You don't want to know**__. You will have to catch up on some school work though, so focus on that._

_It was your idea to drink the memory tea and if you wanted to forget then obviously it was very bad._

_Don't ask questions, don't try to remember, don't think about what was so bad that you would want to desperately forget. Just be happy that you don't have to remember,_

_Cameron Ann Morgan_'

"I drank memory tea? Why?" I asked him.

"You don't want to know," he told me.

"Yes, I do."

"Cammie," Zach took my hands and looked into my eyes. "Really bad things happened to you last year. You don't want to know," Zach looked like he was about to cry.

What was so bad that it makes Zach want to cry?

A tear fell from his eye and I wiped it away with my thumb.

"Please Cammie, you don't want to know," he told me, looking desperate for me to understand.

"Alright Zach, I won't ask anymore," I said and pulled him to me. He held me tightly, like if he let go, I would disappear.

"I love you Cammie," he said as he looked into my eyes. I was shocked.

"Y-you love me?" I asked. He nodded and cupped my face in his hands.

He kissed me.

This kiss was so different from our other kisses. It was so passionate and desperate and full of love.

When he pulled away, ever so slowly, he rested his forehead on mine as we caught our breath.

"I love you too, Zach," I whispered and his eyes locked with mine. He smiled at me and pecked my lips once more. There was a soft knock on the door.

"Hey Zach, is she awake yet?" Liz soft voice whispered through the door. She opened the door and poked her head in, along with Macey and Bex.

"Hey guys," I smiled at them.

"Cammie!" Liz screamed and tackled me in a hug. We fell back onto the bed. I looked at Zach.

"It was that bad?" I asked. He nodded, looking grim.

"You need to eat more," Macey said, I smiled.

"How skinny have you gotten?" Liz asked. I lifted my shirt a bit and looked down and saw that I looked anorexic. The sight honestly made me gasp and scared me half to death.

"Time to go stuff my face," I said and started for the door. Zach took my hand into his as we all walked to the Dining Hall. We stopped short at the door when I heard Mom talking.

"–And don't bring up anything to do with Cammie's running away. She drank memory tea and doesn't want to remember. No matter how much she asks, do not tell her anything. And if you do, there will be a severe punishment."

With that we walked in and everyone fell silent as they turned to us.

"Thank you, that is all," Mom said and hurried away from the podium.

We grabbed some food, and Zach made sure I had _a_ _lot_ of food, and then sat down to eat.

"Alright, so at least tell me if I'm still wanted by the Circle," I said to Zach. He choked on his drink and that shocked me.

"Um, well I don't really know about the_ entire_ Circle, but Catherine isn't," he said and then shoved half of a waffle into his mouth.

"Why not?" I asked. "I thought she was determined to catch me," I said and started on another waffle.

"She was…but she died," Macey said and gave a Zach a sorrowful look but he didn't seem to be bothered that his mother was dead.

Or that he was now an orphan.

"Zach, are you alright?" I asked him, placing a hand on his arm.

"She deserved to die," he said and started to eat his banana.

"She was still your mother Zach," I said softly.

"She was a bitch," he said. "She hurt you," he said softer. I don't think I was supposed to hear him but I still did.

"Do you know how she died?" I asked the girls, Zach was brooding and it worried me, but there wasn't really much I could do.

"Well, she was killed," Bex started but didn't finish.

"By?" I dragged out when they didn't continue. Bex, Liz and Macey all looked at me with sad eyes.

"We can't tell you," they said in union.

"Why not?" I asked, confusion written all over my face.

"Because you asked us not to remind you of anything from the past year and a half," Zach said and wrapped his arm around my waist.

"Did…did I kill her?" I whispered. They all looked at me with sad eyes again but didn't respond.

I looked at Zach.

"Zach…I'm so sorry," I told him. He smirked at me.

"Doesn't matter Gallagher girl, if someone else hadn't of killed her, I would have," he told me like it was no big deal.

I nodded.

I looked at my plate of food and saw I only ate half.

"I'm full," I mumbled.

"You need to eat it all Cammie," Liz told me.

"Alright," I sighed. Zach stopped me.

"It's ok, you can take it slow Gallagher girl," he said and we all got up because I was the only one still eating.

**A/N I'm not leaving it at a cliff hanger because it's going to be a while before I update again. This story is currently on hiatus because I'm writing my first book! :D**

**That's also the reason you got an extra long chapter.**

**Hope you enjoyed it.**

**R&R**

**~ Gracie**


	22. Chapter 22

**A/N I am sooooo sorry I did this to you guys, I didn't think you would get THAT excited. Now I feel kind of bad…oh well, enjoy!**

_I felt pain in my head and fell to my knees in the middle of the corridor, screaming in agonizing pain, clutching my head for all I was worth._

_Nobody stopped walking._

_I felt my vision blur and started to blackout._

I looked up with weary eyes; my head feeling heavier than it should, and saw Catherine smiling like mad at me, looking away from a TV screen that showed static.

My breathing was thick and my throat was sore from the screaming.

My eyes fluttered back closed. "You…crazy bitch," I sneered.

She merely laughed.

"You have some interesting dreams. And a fondness of Zachary…" she paused, a sour look on her face. "I'm going to have to change that," she murmured.

"What more could you do? Kill me? Go ahead, you'd be doing me a favor," I said, regain a bit of strength.

"I will do nothing of the sort," she said with a shocked look on her face and a light hand placed on her chest, mocking hurt. That is, until her hand curled into a fist and her face morphed from shock and slightly hurt to evil, "That would be far too easy."

"Of course it would," I grumbled. "Then what is it, exactly, that you are going to do to me?" I asked.

I was vaguely aware that the camera behind me was blinking and making a small red dot show up on the wall behind Catherine, telling me everything was live.

"Oh, not you. Not yet," she smiled evilly. "Zachary, on the other hand, will be going through a bit of torture," she winked and walked out.

I started struggling hard to get out of my chains, out of my chair, out of this crazy hell hole I was trapped in. "You fucking psycho! You'd torture your own son?!" I started to beat my back into the chair to knock it over, hoping a different angle would give better means of escape.

I quickly found out the chair was bolted to the floor.

I started to notice that tears were streaming down my face as I struggled to get out of the chair.

I screamed.

I screamed in pain; the pain that I was going through and what Zach might go through if Catherine got a hold of him.

I screamed in annoyance; the annoyance that I couldn't get out of this Goddamn chair.

I screamed in anger; the anger that Catherine had gotten the better of me, so many fucking times.

I screamed. I screamed because I just couldn't hold it in anymore.

My scream died off into sobs. I started rocking in my chair again, hell bent on knocking it over.

"Dammit bitch! Let me go!" I shouted.

I think I finally lost it.

-Page Break-

It had been about two days with no people, other than a goon that came in to change the batteries in the camera and one who came in shortly after Catherine to get the helmet.

Catherine walked back in a few hours later with a needle in hand. The needle had a thick looking, deep red liquid in it. I glared at her and kept moving as she tried to stick it in my arm.

"Stop struggling or Zachary's torture will be far worse!" she shouted and my struggles stopped immediately as my body went rigid. The thought of Zach being tortured alone made me angry, the fact that she threatened to make it worse made me furious, but I obeyed nevertheless.

I felt the thick liquid enter my arm and twitched a little, fighting the urge to jerk my arm away from her. She smiled when she pulled it out, seemingly pleased with herself and her handy work.

My thoughts started to get foggy and clouded, making me shake my head, for no apparent reason, and knocking my messy and nasty hair in front of my face.

Before I could even ask what she injected me with, she slapped a napotine patch on my cheek.

I passed out.

-Page Break-

When I came to, I noticed that my wrists were chained above my head and I was completely naked.

Not only that, but I was clean and shaved, like someone had groomed me while I was knocked out. It made me very uncomfortable at the thought of being touched while unconscious.

I heard a yawn in front of me and noticed Zach for the first time, he was chained up the same way as me but he still had pants on, so he was shirtless.

He was also a few meters away.

I think; my vision was still blurry.

My thoughts still foggy.

I shook my head again, knocking my clean and shampooed hair in front of my face.

It smelled like strawberries.

Zach groaned and his eyes fluttered open. He examined the room before his eyes landed on me.

"Cammie, Cammie what happened? Are you ok?" he asked, jerking at his hands to get closer to me, his eyes not leaving mine. He looked so concerned.

If I were in my right mind, I would have asked how he got here, if he was hurt. But because I wasn't in my right mind so,

I giggled. "You're so cute," I sighed and leaned my head on my arm, looking at him dreamily.

He looked at me oddly. "Cammie, what's happened?" he asked, taking a slight step forward, not far though, his arms restricting him.

I giggled again.

"What's wrong is that you are _all the way_ over there, and I'm stuck over here, all by myself," I said as my eyes stared at his yummy looking chest and abs. He is so hot.

I bit my lip and looked back into his eyes.

Catherine and two other guys walked in just as he was about to say something. I smiled and waved, as best I could, at them.

"Cathy! Long time no see," I giggled.

She smiled.

Zach frowned. "What did you do to her?" he nearly shouted, but didn't.

She laughed lightly. "We just gave her some serum to make her, what's the word I'm looking for…" she paused and had a thoughtful look on her face, making me giggle again, "Easy. To make her easy," she smiled innocently at her son –who was scowling in return –before turning to me. "We have someone new who would _love_ to meet you and someone you might just remember," she said and the two goons stepped towards me.

I squinted my eyes at the two guys in front of me before smiling brightly. "Nope, not a clue," I giggled.

Catherine seemed really amused by the sight of me acting the way I was while Zach looked really pissed.

Was he mad at me?

"This is Ryan, the boy you spent your first three months with," she said and Ryan stepped forward.

"Miss me?" he asked, smirking.

"Nope, you were a total dickhead," I smiled and giggled again. He scowled at me and Zach chuckled a little, his smirk on his face for a second before he scowled at his mom again.

"And this is Wilson, he just completed his first mission with flying colors and we thought it would be nice to treat him to a reward," Catherine smiled at me. "You, my dear sweet girl, are that reward," she told me.

"I'll take that as a compliment," I said and giggled while spinning around a little, having some fun, my mind currently preoccupied with swinging.

"She's so fucking adorable," Wilson chuckled and started looking me over. I giggled again.

"Why thank you," I smiled and twirled in a circle, giggling as I did.

"Don't fucking touch her!" Zach growled out, practically demanding that they step away from me.

"Ryan," Catherine said and he walked to the door, letting three more guys in before walking out himself.

"Where's he going?" I asked Catherine who was putting duck tape over Zach's mouth.

"He was just stopping by, he has other girls to rape, other people to torture," she said nonchalantly and I nodded as if I understood, when, really, I didn't.

Wilson was still looking me over and licked his lips causing me giggle and Zach to lurch forward, only to be pulled back by his restraints and growl at him instead.

Two of the guys that came in walked to either side of me and the other went behind Zach, grabbing a whip and standing two meters behind him, I think.

Was he going to hit Zach?

That stopped me from my spinning and giggling immediately.

Before I could ask what he was going to do to Zach the guys beside me turned me to the side a little, picked up a leg each and held them apart, making a "whoop" escape my mouth at the sudden movement followed by a giggle.

Wilson chuckled and Zach glared at him. I noticed the bulge in Wilson's pants and giggled before throwing my head back and closing my eyes.

"Well, _someone's_ excited," I said humorlessly, a bit of sarcasm to my tone. When Catherine spoke I lifted my head and opened my eyes.

"Wilson, she's all yours. Billy, he moves…well, you know what to do," she nodded to the guy behind Zach and he nodded back, gripping the whip in his hand a bit tighter.

"Billy? What the hell kind of name is that?" I giggled. "That's a little boys name, that's what kind; you are a grown fucking man in the Circle, go by something more intimidating, for God's sake!" I said, annoyed that he was going to hit Zach.

"I'd bite your tongue if I were you," his deep voice bellowed out, "I'm the one with the whip and your boy toy at my disposal." He gestured to Zach.

"He isn't my _boy_ _toy_," I said with edge to my words, "The only boy toy I ever had was a remote control race car," I told him matter-of-factly and Wilson chuckled again. "Why are you laughing? I was being serious!" I said and realized that the guys' hold on my legs tightened a bit.

"I like them feisty," Wilson said a stepped towards me. Zach's fists tightened and Billy gripped the whip tighter.

Wilson, my newest rapist, slid a finger inside me and only then did I realize how horny I really was. He slipped another in and started to thrust into my already wet pussy, making me toss my head back and moan in pleasure, moving my hips a little to meet his thrusts.

That is, until I heard the whip make contact with skin. My whole body stiffened as I turned to Zach and saw he was gritting his teeth, his eyes closed and muscles tensed up while, behind him, Billy was smiling smugly.

Wilson added a third and I whimpered as he curled his fingers to rubbed my G-spot.

"Open your fucking eyes!" the guy to my left shouted and I heard the whip make contact again and Zach grunted.

I winced.

They were forcing him to watch?

He started to press harder into the sensitive bundle of nerves and I threw my head back, letting out a long moan, feeling my walls tighten around his fingers. I started to pant out small whimpers of pleasure as he started to rub my clit with his thumb and massage my G-spot with his fingers.

Why was I so horny?!

His hand went away, no longer inside me.

I whined a little at the lost contact.

While I was catching my breath, Wilson was making his way over to Zach, his fingers glistening with my wetness.

"How does it feel," Wilson started, smirking, looking smugly at his dripping wet hand, "Knowing that your girl is this wet for another man?" he turned away from his hand, to Zach, who looked murderous and incredibly sad at the same time.

His hands jerk.

My eyes closed.

He got whipped.

I winced.

He grunted.

I whimpered.

I felt a cold, wet hand slide around my pussy and I gasped at the sudden contact, reveling in the feeling it brought.

I heard a zipper then fabric moving around and looked down just in time to see Wilson thrust into me, making a high pitched whimper escape my lips, a whip sounded in the background, and my lulled back, a string of moans leaving my mouth as he thrust deep into my.

Either Zach stopped moving or I was caught up in the sex, but I no longer heard the whip as I moaned and Wilson groaned.

He shot his cum deep inside me then pulled out.

The guys holding me let go but my legs were too weak to support myself, so I dangled by my arms, my knees bent and shoulders in pain at the sudden weight they had to support.

I felt my chin being gripped and lazily opened my eyes and looked into Wilson's own dark grey ones, still lusty.

"Until next time, my sweet," he whispered and his lips touched mine.

I didn't kiss back.

He pulled back and smiled sweetly before I turned wicked and he slapped me, hard.

My head snapped to the side, and a small whimper of pain slipped past my lips.

All they guys laughed as they walked out, Wilson shouted "Fucking slut!" as they walked out the door.

I was too weak to even try and stand up and whatever it was that Catherine injected into my arm was still in my system, so I felt very little shame as I started to cry a little, my hair curtaining around my face.

"Cammie?" Zach soft voice asked. I guess he got the duck tape off.

I ignored him.

I hurt him.

All because I love him.

"Cammie," Zach's voice was a bit stronger now.

I still didn't respond.

I continued to let hot, salty tears roll down my cheeks, one stinging and probably had a bright red hand print on it.

"Gallagher girl," Zach's voice was weak, also sad when he spoke this time.

I tilted my head up a bit, my hair uncovering part of my face.

"I'm so sorry," I whispered as more sobs broke free and tears fell from my eyes faster than before. My head fell back down as I sobbed again.

The door opened and closed and tried my absolute hardest to stop crying and I, more or less, did, the tears just didn't stop falling. But I was no longer sobbing.

My chin was jerked up and I was face to face with Catherine.

"I just wanted to thank you, you really made Wilson's day," she smiled and patted my sore cheek with more strength than necessary. "You truly sounded like a whore off the street, you know, minus the dirty talk," she winked again and no matter how hard you try, you just don't seem scary when you have tears streaming down your face.

But dammit, I tried.

"You _would_ know," I commented and her grip on my chin tightened as she glared at me.

She slapped me.

"You behave so much better when you're high," she sighed and shook her head in disappointment.

"Fuck you!" I shouted at her. She got up and grabbed the whip, standing behind Zach.

"One more word and I'll hit him," she threatened.

Needless to say, I shut up.

She smiled crookedly.

"Or maybe I will anyways."

She hit him.

His face contorted into pain but he didn't make a sound.

"It's been a while since little Zachary had a whooping," she laughed and whipped him again.

I squeaked a little at the sight and her head snapped to me.

"Did you say something Cameron dear?" she asked, smirking.

I shook my head, eyes wide.

"Speak when I'm talking to you!" she shouted and held the whip high, ready to hit Zach again.

But you said not to talk or you would hit him! I wanted to shout. But didn't.

I opened my mouth to respond but no words came out.

"Don't Cammie," Zach said then got whipped.

"Don't talk!" she shouted.

I dangled there, not knowing what to do. Then a plan came to mind, it was risky, but worth a shot.

"Um, Catherine?" I asked in a soft voice. She lifted the whip so I hurried, "I have a question!" I said before she whipped Zach. She slowly lowered the whip a bit, but not much.

"What?" she sounded unsure.

"Can I have some clothes?" I asked, forcing blush to my cheeks, trying to look as innocent as possible, while still looking believable. "Please?" I asked when I thought she would say no.

She lowered the whip completely.

"I suppose," she trailed off and walked to the door.

Once the door closed I looked at it for ten seconds before turning back to Zach, my eyes wide.

"I'm sorry for whatever is about to happen," I whispered, in case someone was listening in.

"Sorry for what? What's about to happen?" he whispered as well, looking a bit worried now too.

"I-I'm just apologizing a head of time," I whispered and the door was opened. Catherine and two goons, the ones that held my legs, came in. She was carrying a tank top and shorts. The goons pulled out guns and pointed them at me as Catherine walked up; Zach looked extremely worried now, but didn't say a word, knowing far better.

I reset my footing so I was standing straight again and she unhooked my arms before handing me the clothes, taking a step back. I quickly put on the clothes. I watched as Catherine hooked my arms back and felt a bit of comfort in knowing how it hooked.

She went back to the whip and the goons left, putting their guns away.

While her back was turned I mouthed to Zach "I'm so sorry."

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath before flipping my feet above myself and slipping them between my arms. I quickly thanked my lucky stars that the bondages weren't metal, relaxed my hands and bucked my feet out, painfully forcing myself free.

Sadly, I fell onto my back.

And landed on concrete.

Also getting Catherine's attention.

"You little –" I got up and ran at her, trying with all my might to stop her from hurting Zach, not really caring for myself at the moment.

I was my fault he was in this mess anyways.

I shouldn't have fallen for him.

Shouldn't have loved him.

We started to fight, trying to get an advantage every chance we got. Which wasn't often, we were both Gallagher girls, trained the same fighting styles, though we have our own dirty moves.

She'd kick at me I would dodge, I'd throw a punch she would dodge, it was a back and forth thing and got boring fast. We were pretty evenly matched. That is, until she tripped over a stray foot that may, or may not, belong to a very innocence looking Zachary Goode who just so happen to be fighting a smirk and staring the opposite direction at the moment.

I landed one good punch to Catherine's face as she fell to the ground.

I quickly undid Zach's wrist bondages and then realized how bad my wrist and back where from earlier.

I also realized Zach's back was probably far worse than mine.

"Zach, let me see your back," I said gently.

"I'm fine Gallagher –" I rolled my eyes and went to look at his back myself, since he wasn't about to turn around. The sight made a small gasp slip out.

His back had multiple whip marks that were bright red, some open, and blood was rolling down his back.

"Oh my God," I whispered as my hand covered my mouth.

"Its fine, it'll heal," he shrugged.

"Shut up! This isn't something to take lightly Zach!" I hissed. I didn't mean for it to come off so harsh, but I couldn't take that he didn't care that much. He turned and faced me.

"It'll heal," he whispered.

Tears formed in the corner of my eyes and frustration racked through me.

"I care about you too damn much for you to take this lightly!" I slapped his chest in anger then rested my head there, crying. He didn't even seem slightly fazed by the slap as he wrapped his arms around me and rested his head on mine.

I had to reframe from wrapping my arms around him, worried I'd hurt him further.

"I'm so sorry this happened," I whispered, cradling my wrist to my chest, still resting on his. "If I had left with you –or better yet, just stayed at the Academy, none of this would have happened," his hand rested on the back of my head and he shushed me, rocking us from side to side slightly.

"It's ok. We can't change the past, but we can change the future, so, let's start by getting out of here," he said and looked down at me, a small smirking playing at his lips.

I sniffled and offered a small smile in return then nodded my head.

He smiled.

A genuine smile.

That's rare coming from Zach.

He then leaned down and kissed me softly, which I gratefully and wholeheartedly returned.

Then he grabbed my hand and led us to the door, but not before I kicked Catherine in the head as hard as I possibly could, hoping to have ended her life but doubting it.

This _is_ Catherine Goode we're talking about.

When we walked out Zach bumped into someone, causing me to bump into him and causing him to hiss in pain because I hit his back and cuts, coving my (new?) shirt in blood.

"Sorry!" I rushed a then wondered why we weren't fighting anyone. I peeked over his shoulder and saw Bex, along with Macey, Joe, Mom and Liz.

Zach's face was still scrunched up in pain and I was seriously worried.

"Zach?" I asked.

"I'm good," he whispered out.

"C'mon we have to get y'all out of here!" Liz urged.

"Zach, what's wrong?" Joe asked, looking concerned.

Zach was about to wave him off but I didn't let him.

"He got hurt, bad," I said and nudged him forward, for us to get out of here. Joe nodded but we continued talking anyways.

"What happened?" he asked.

"He got hit with a whip repeatedly," I mumbled, feeling bad because it was my fault he got whipped in the first place.

"Are you alright Zach?" Mom asked.

"I'm fine," he said.

I shot him a glared, which he ignored.

"What about you Cam? Are you ok?" Macey asked, glancing back at me.

"I've been better," I shrugged.

"Are you alright though?" Liz asked.

"I've been worse," I said again, seriously not wanting to go into detail about it at the moment.

Bex didn't seem to pick up on that though.

"Bloody hell Cam –are you hurt?" she snapped.

I hesitated.

"I might have sprained my wrists and cut my back up a bit, but I'm fine," I shrugged again.

Zach looked down at me with worried eyes. "You really shouldn't have done that," he looked at my wrist that were now a slight purple shade, "You could have done far more damage to yourself."

"Exactly, but I didn't," I said.

"Cam –"

"I said I'm fine Zach. I'm more concerned about you than myself," I told him.

He was silent for a moment. "Does stuff like that always happen to you?" he asked.

"This is the first time they've used drugs," I shrugged, not really wanting to talk about my rape and torture.

"You will give us every detail of what happened after you woke up," Joe said as we walked out, passing bodies as we went and walked up to a helicopter.

Zach and I sat beside each other while we got our backs checked, his stitched a bit, and I got my wrists wrapped.

Once all that was done I was leaning my head on his shoulder and he was leaning his head on mine, his arm wrapped around my waist.

"I'm so sorry you had to see that," I whispered, my eyes closed.

He pulled me to his chest, straddling him, and shushed me again. Nuzzling his face in my hair and kissing my neck softly.

"I'm sorry you had to go through it," he whispered.

His words caused me to choke on a sob and hug his neck, where he wasn't whipped, and cry softly into the crook of his neck.

He held me tighter.

His shook a little and I felt water drop onto my shoulder.

He was crying.

"I'm so sorry, I didn't mean any of it," I sob on his chest, shaking my head.

"Shhh, you were drugged, I don't blame you," he pet my hair.

"But I'm the reason you got hurt," I whispered and pulled my arms back to my chest, clutching them there.

"No you aren't." he told me firmly.

I didn't believe him.

I shook my head on his chest but didn't speak.

His gripped my shoulders and leaned so our faces were mere inches apart and looked deep into my eyes.

"It is not your fault that I got hurt," he said slowly, enunciating every word, trying to make me understand.

I still had tears in my eyes, my arms clutched to my chest, straddling Zach.

I sniffled.

When I didn't respond to him his eyes widened a bit and he raised his eyebrows, wanting me to respond and tell him I understood.

More tears filled my eyes and my bottom lip gutted out and I sobbed again, letting my head fall forward.

Zach pulled me back to his chest, holding me tight.

He kept murmuring to me that it wasn't my fault and petting my hair, rocking me back and forth, as if I were a five year old that scrapped my knee after falling off my bike.

I ended up falling asleep on his chest.

"_Cam…"_

"_Cammie."_

"_Cameron!"_

"_Cameron Morgan!"_

"_Cameron Ann Morgan!"_

"_Gallagher girl, wake up," Zach's sweet voice lulled me from my slumber…_

I leaned my head off the desk it was on.

Wait!

Desk?!

"Holy fuck!" I shouted and pushed myself, and the wooden chair I was sitting in, backwards, tipping the chair.

My eyes widened, "Shit!" I squeaked out.

It chair hit the floor.

"Ow," I mumbled.

Wait, my back doesn't hurt.

"What the hell is happening?!" I shouted and quickly get out of the chair and to my feet.

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw everyone looking at me in shock.

"What?" I whispered and look down at myself, not seeing any scars. "W-what happened?" I whispered, looking at my arms and legs, lifting my shirt and vest, not finding any scars.

"Cammie…did you just curse? A lot?" Liz asked.

I looked at all of them, Bex and Macey looked impressed, Zach looked shocked and Liz looked scared.

I laughed.

"This is another dream, isn't it?" I asked.

"What dream?" Zach asked, taking a step forward.

I shook my head and my laughing died down a bit.

"Those stupid, fucked up dreams your mother keep putting me through!" I say like it's the most obvious thing in the word.

They all looked scared.

"We should get you checked out in the infirmary Cam," Bex walks towards me, grabbing my wrist.

The hairs on the back of my neck stand on end and I get a prickling down my spine. In the next second, I flipped Bex over my shoulder and flat onto her back with my hand having a steal grip on her neck, me kneeling beside her.

"Don't touch," I whisper, my eyes narrowed.

She looked terrified.

I let go and backed away from all of them.

I closed my eyes and took deep breaths, leaning into the corner I walked into.

"What the –Cam!" Macey shouted as she and Liz helped Bex up.

Tears started to leak from my eyes as I clutched my hands to my chest again.

"Wake up, wake up, wake up, wake up, wake up," I kept whispering to myself, turning and banging my head on the wall every time I repeated those two words, desperate to wake up from these stupid dreams.

"Liz, go get Solomon and Ms. Morgan," I heard Bex whisper.

A gentle hand rested on my shoulder.

My eyes snapped open.

I grabbed the person's hand and twisted it behind their back then pinned them to the wall.

"Ouch! Gallagher girl, chill out," Zach said.

"Don't. Touch," I snapped at him, glaring.

He tried to push of the wall but I kicked the back of his knees, forcing him back into the wall.

"What's going on in here?" Mom gasped as she and Solomon came towards me.

I pushed Zach's arm to the point of almost breaking, making him hiss in pain and them freeze in fear.

"Cameron, what has gotten into you?" Solomon asked.

I looked at them with an intense glare before I sighed and released Zach, turning him and hugging him gently.

"What happened?" I whispered, feeling so confused.

I felt Zach gently push me off of him, not letting me go, but not letting me touch.

"What are you talking about?" he asked.

I turned to Mom, "Did I drink memory tea?" I asked, cocking my head to the side.

"Wha –kiddo, we have never given you memory tea," she looked confused.

"So…what?" I asked and turned to Zach.

"I think you just had a bad dream Gallagher girl," he told me.

My eyes widened.

"So…none of that ever happened?" I gasped then a huge smile spread on my face. "Oh thank God!" I shouted as tears streamed down my face and I lunged myself into Zach's arms again, not as gentle. "I'm so sorry Zach, I'm so, so sorry," I cried onto his chest, clinging to him as if he were my life line. "I'll never happen again, I'm so sorry, I love you so much," I whispered to him and cried on his chest while he held me.

It occurred to me that he was a slight bit stiffer because of what I said…and that he didn't say it back…

"What the hell is this Cameron?" Mom asked, sounding really mad.

I looked and saw they were all looking at my CoveOps report.

The last page.

The note.

"What do you mean Zach was right?" Macey's eyes narrowed and turned to Zach.

I sighed.

"Alright, let me explain. Zach and I were talking last night," I started and could feel Zach tense a bit, realizing what I was talking about. "We were talking about the Circle and how we are the only people they would think twice about killing. He asked me to run away with him," everyone shot him daggers, "But I said no. It wasn't until later that I started to think it would be better if I left by myself," Zach tensed again and his arms were tighter around my waist, "I was packed and ready to go, I must have fallen asleep while writing you my note." I shrugged.

"If you were going to leave then why are you telling us?" Liz asked.

"Because I'm not going now; I had a _horrible_ dream about what happened to me when I left," I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, calming myself and my emotions, "The dream alone caused me to flip Bex, almost break Zach's arm and me to curse…a lot," Mom and Solomon looked a bit mad about that, knowing I don't curse, "I-It was so scary and I didn't know wh-what to do," I sobbed and Zach held me tighter.

"What happened in the dream?" Macey asked.

"If you want to talk about it that is," Liz mumbled, seeing how emotional just mentioning it made me.

"I will, but first, is Dr. Steve here?" I asked.

That seemed to throw them off.

"Did someone ask for me?" he asked, pocking his head in. _Idiot_.

An animalistic growl left me and I lung out of Zach's arms and at Dr. Sanders.

"Cammie!" everyone shouted as I pinned him to the ground and wrapped my hands around his neck.

I snarling at him and he was looking slightly shocked.

"Fucking asshole!" I shouted at him. Solomon tried to pry me off of him.

"Let him go Cameron!" Joe shouted, obviously struggling.

Zach helped him.

I was kicking and clawing to get to him.

He held his neck and gasped for air.

"He's working for the Circle!" I shouted, fighting harder.

Steve started to laugh evilly. Everyone turned to him and I started to huff and puff, glaring at him and the gun he was now pointing at me.

"How'd you know?" he inquired.

"A little birdie told me," I replied sarcastically.

He nodded him head, "Excellent!" he smiled brightly before it curled into a wicked grin. "Now hand over the girl." He ordered.

"I won't tell you the names!" I shouted at him.

"So you do know them?" he quirked and eyebrow.

"Even if I did I wouldn't tell you," I replied and crossed my arms, Zach and Solomon having sat me on my own two feet.

He chuckled.

"You naïve little –"

"Shut the hell up," there were gasp heard around the small room, "you think you can come on my turf and threaten me? I know your stupid little plan and it won't work, you know," I said defiantly.

"Oh really? And what would be that plan?" he smirked.

"You underestimate me Doctor," I shook my head in shame, "You and Catherine are going to torture me to my breaking point," I said and he looked a bit off. "You're going to tie me up to a bed in the basement of a little house in the Switzerland Alps," I continued and he shuffled on his feet, still pointing the gun at me. "You're going to send a guy down to do _unspeakable_ things to me while I listen to that God forsaken music!" I snapped and took a daring step forward. "Just to get the names, the ones of which I shall not be telling you," I paused and looked him over, "If I knew them, that is," I reply.

He continues to shuffle on his feet before shifting his gun to Liz.

"You will come with me, or I will shoot her," he changed tactics.

Liz was frozen in place looking like a deer caught in head lights.

I knew by the desperate look in his eyes that he would kill her just to get to me.

He'd kill everyone here to get to me.

He swallowed hard when I didn't change my expression and moved so both hands were holding the gun.

"What are your terms?" I asked, cocking a hip.

"Gallagher girl, don't, we can handle this," Zach whispered to me.

"I'm not going to let anyone get hurt," I told him stubbornly.

"If you do this _you'll_ get hurt," he pleaded.

I sighed and closed my eyes.

"I'm willing to risk it," I replied and felt the gun get pressed to my temple.

My eyes snapped open and darted to Steve who was smiling maliciously at me.

He looked me over.

He licked his lips.

"I might just have to go before Ryan," he whispered huskily.

"Ew," I replied as I looked him over. "Fat fuckin' chance," I rolled my eyes.

He glared.

"You don't really have much of a choice love," he replied and grabbed my arm.

I closed my eyes again and took a deep breath.

The air around me shifted and my eyes snapped open.

Steve was about to punch me.

I grabbed him fist, twisted and ducked just as he fired the gun, missing me and hitting the lamp, sending glass everywhere.

I grabbed the gun and pointed it at him, my foot pressing down on his throat now that he was laying flat on his back.

"Lizzie, look away," I warned and heard her squeak.

I fired.

**A/N nice long chapter, also confusing. Tell me what you think of the very large twist!**

**R&R**

**~ Gracie**


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